


Would you risk it ALL?

by ireallyshouldnt_behere



Series: We can have it ALL, can't we? [1]
Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Feels, Explicit Language, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-05 08:55:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 30,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25348081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ireallyshouldnt_behere/pseuds/ireallyshouldnt_behere
Summary: In hindsight, she should have known something was wrong when the doctor's office called early that morning asking her to come back in.
Relationships: Korra/Asami Sato
Series: We can have it ALL, can't we? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1858651
Comments: 299
Kudos: 641
Collections: Best of Korrasami





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be a short chapter to start off but the others will be longer...you'll see why.

Korra wished with all her being, to every spirit out there, good or bad, that she could go back to 30 minutes ago. She would give anything to be back in that blissful time of her ignorance and unknown. Yet here she was, referral paper in hand, unable to break the time space continuum to make herself feel better. 

And that’s why she was here in the first place, right? She hadn’t felt good for weeks, she had pushed off the aches and nausea for longer than she knew she should, but it was just a stubborn flu, right? Her night sweats would go away soon enough and her appetite would come back, right?

_ Right? _

“Cancer?” She cut into Tenzin’s words, having not heard a damn thing over the last few minutes. “Tell me this isn’t happening, Tenzin. Please.”

He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, silently noting how pale she was for her normally dark skin. “Korra I know you must be afraid, but I will do whatever I can to make sure you’re alright. That oncologist I referred you to is one of the best I’ve seen in all my years, I trust her completely.”

“It was just the flu,” she mumbled, turning watery eyes towards her doctor. “Why is this happening to me? I thought—I thought it was the flu.”

His entire countenance sagged. “It can happen to anyone, Korra, and that’s the worst part. But you’re a fighter, I know you can do this.” She fell into his arms and he held her tight while she let it sink in. 

“I’m scared,” she mumbled into his arm. It had always been nice, having one of their oldest family friends as her primary care doctor. Tenzin was blunt and to the point when it came to health and medicine, but he was also loving and gentle. Korra knew deep down that this was hurting him just as much, if not more, than her. 

“You’re going to be ok, Korra,” he said with a squeeze and pulled her back. “Dr. Sato will take great care of you. This is a personal favor for me, so she has to.” He gave her a small smile and she chuckled, wiping away some stray tears. 

“Come on let’s get you signed out and on your way,” he said as he made for the door, stopping to let her hop off the table and walk with him. “I’ve already made an appointment with Dr. Sato for you for tomorrow morning first thing at Republic City General Hospital. She’s going to have to run more tests to get a better idea of what’s going on, but you’re in great hands.”

“Thanks, Tenzin,” she said with a tight chest. “I’ll see you Friday?”

“You haven’t missed family dinner in 6 years, Korra,” he replied with a pat on her shoulder. 

She smiled and turned towards the door. 

“Oh and Korra?” He added, “don’t mention anything about Dr. Sato’s age, ok? She doesn’t take too kindly about that.”

Before Korra could ask what that was about, Tenzin turned and walked away. She looked at the referral paper as she rode the elevator down, reading the bold lettering,  **‘** **_Dr. Asami Sato, M.D. — Oncology/Hematology_ ** **’** for the hundredth time. Was she ancient or something? Knowing Tenzin, probably. He was always going on about “the old masters of medicine” and giving passionate statements during numerous family dinners about pioneers in the medical field. It didn’t help that his mom and dad had been two of the best doctors in the world when they were in their prime, but whatever. 

She was trembling by the time she got back to her apartment, only slightly wary of the fact that she hardly remembered the 10 minute drive back. She sat down gingerly on her couch, feeling nauseous at the ache in her body that she clearly had misread for the last few weeks. A giant ball of fluff came to rest by her side and she stroked soft hair as her mind swirled. 

Korra couldn’t tell if the fact she felt like she got hit by a freight train was from the cancer, or just the fact that she had been told that she has  _ cancer _ . 

In hindsight, she should have known something was wrong when the doctor's office called early that morning asking her to come back in. She had done blood work yesterday to see if she had the flu or something, but she had never dreamt of it actually being  _ something _ . 

Before her mind could tumble down the dark abyss of what could happen, the ball of fluff next to her whined. 

“Do you need to go outside, girl?” Korra asked as big black eyes stared at her. The dog panted and licked a large wet tongue straight up her face. 

“Thank you for the bath, Naga,” she said with a small laugh and pushed herself off the couch. She fought the mild dizziness and headed for the door.  _ You’re a fighter, I know you can do this _ . Tenzin’s words rang through her head and she smiled. Fuck yea she could do this. She was a fighter and she was going to make cancer her bitch. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise the chapters after this will be longer.
> 
> Also, I will put in each note before a chapter if something is mentioned that might bother you if you want to avoid it, and I'll have notes at the end of each chapter explaining what some of the things are, but I really hope you read and enjoy this fic. Cheers!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mention of needles.

She thrummed her fingers lightly on the crinkly hospital bed paper she sat on as she waited for her doctor. The nurse who took her vitals said Dr. Sato would be in shortly, but Korra figured that she must be truly ancient and could hardly walk as it had been nearly 20 minutes since then. 

A gentle knock on the door made her sit up straight. 

“Hello?” A voice, a young voice, said as the door opened. “I’m so sorry for the wait, I had an issue to deal with. Korra, is it? I’m Dr. Sato.”

Korra shook the offered hand in front of her but was completely speechless. Dr. Sato was not ancient, not at all. In fact, she couldn’t be more than a year or two older than Korra, who was 23: and she was gorgeous. She had stared for too long, apparently. 

“Korra? Are you alright?”

“I’m gay.” Korra said in awe. 

Dr. Sato raised an eyebrow and Korra mentally slapped herself when she realized what she said. 

“I’m okay!” She backpedaled. “I’m fine. I have cancer. It’s nice to meet you, I’m Korra.”

Dr. Sato was gracious enough to maintain somewhat of a straight face over her word vomit. 

“Yes, cancer does seem to be the reason why you’re here,” the goddess replied. Bluntness, she liked it. “How about you tell me what’s been going on and for how long?”

Korra nodded and took a moment to gather her thoughts.  _ She’s a professional, Korra _ , she told herself.  _ Keep it together.  _

“Well at first I thought I was coming down with the flu,” she started, “I felt tired and achy and didn’t want to eat, which is unusual for me because I eat a lot.”

Dr. Sato smiled. “Ok good. Now how long has this been happening?”

“A little over three weeks now?” Korra replied as she tried to do the math in her head. “Oh and I got a few nosebleeds, which has never happened to me before and I play professional soccer.”  _ Had to sprinkle that into the conversation didn’t you, hotshot? _

“Any other symptoms?” The doctor asked. 

“Nothing that ever jumped out at me,” Korra offered, taking on a tone of seriousness now. “I was just getting annoyed that I couldn’t keep up with my dog on our usual morning runs, that’s why I went to my doctors for a checkup. I really just thought I had a stubborn flu.”

Dr. Sato nodded and turned to wash her hands. “Not uncommon at all, but I’m glad you didn’t push it off any longer. You would be surprised how many people ignore what their bodies tell them.” She dried off her hands and grabbed the stethoscope around her neck. “I’m going to check a few things on you, if that’s ok?”

“Not a problem.” Korra was used to a regular checkup. She got physicals often as a professional soccer player and even before then she liked to make sure her body was healthy. But when a beautiful doctor was about to put her beautiful hands on her body? Well, Korra’s heartbeat might have spiked a little. 

“Take a deep breath for me,” Dr. Sato said with the stethoscope on one side of her chest, repeating it on the other and then four times on her back. The light touch of warm hands and the smell of jasmine and something else gave her goosebumps. 

Dr. Sato wrapped the stethoscope back around her neck and stood in front of Korra. “Ok I’m going to examine your lymph nodes and your stomach for any swelling that might indicate what we’re dealing with so just sit tight, is that ok?”

Korra just nodded and let the doctor do her work. She looked at the chart on the wall in front of her for a distraction as nimble fingers pressed on the back and side of her neck, then in both of her armpits which made her giggle. 

“I’m sorry, I should have warned you.”

“It’s ok,” Korra offered, “you gotta do what you gotta do.”

The doctor nodded and smiled. “Alright now I’m going to have you lay back so I can examine your stomach.” She pulled out a foot rest from the bed as Korra laid down. 

She pressed on a few spots before stopping. “Korra, I need you to relax your stomach for me a bit.”

“What? Oh, sorry.” She hadn’t realized that her stomach was tense until that moment. Not that she wanted to show off her abs, because let’s be honest they are pretty great, but she really was just nervous about this whole thing. 

Dr. Sato finished her examination and let Korra sit up. “Right, so I didn’t feel anything abnormal but we are going to need to run a few tests to figure out exactly what’s going on and how advanced it is.”

She nodded numbly. “Ok.”

“How are you feeling?” It wasn’t asked like that boring, trope-y therapist type question but Dr. Sato asked with genuine interest. “About all of this?”

Korra fidgeted slightly. “To be honest I was really scared. Still am. But I’m young and healthy, right? I can totally kick this cancer’s ass.”

“Good, I like your enthusiasm,” she replied with an appreciative nod. “We’ll have a deeper discussion about things once we narrow down what’s going on in there, but I want you to remain a fighter, ok? You are young and healthy but this won’t be a walk in the park.”

“I know,” Korra said and sat up a little straighter. “And Dr. Sato? Can you-can you promise to tell me like it is? I don’t want anything sugar coated. If I’m doing bad, I want to know.”

Green eyes bore into her for a beat. “I think I can do that for you.” She paused and looked at Korra’s chart for the first time since coming in. “So we’re going to start with more specific bloodwork and then...”

//

Asami picked up her tray with her meager lunch on it before searching the somewhat bustling cafeteria for her sidekick. She spotted the small black bob she was looking far and made her way over, she needed to vent.

“I simultaneously want to worship Tenzin and kill him,” Asami groaned as she sat down and picked at her bagel. 

Opal laughed and reached for the fruit bowl on her tray. “What did the master do this time?”

Asami slapped her hand away before continuing. “This new patient he referred to me,” she groaned again. “She’s basically an extra daughter to him and she just so happens to be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Like honestly, she’s practically a goddess.”

“The audacity!” Opal feigned. “Should our old professor only send you ugly cancer patients? Peasants, not gods?”

“It’s not that,” Asami shook her head seriously. “It’s a little daunting, you know? She is young and healthy, oh spirits is she healthy, but you know how cancer is.”

Opal’s eyes lost their magic for a moment. “Yea I know, that’s why we’re here, though, isn’t it? I mean I know we joke but we’re here to help.”

Asami nodded with a half smile. “I know, it’s just he really sounded worried when he called in the favor. He’s known her his whole life, so this will be a little closer to home for me. With most patients I can distance myself, but this one might go a little differently. What if I fail him, fail  _ them _ ?”

“But he also came to you for a reason, Sams,” Opal offered. “You’re a fucking hematology rockstar. That cancer doesn’t know who it’s messing with!”

“You’re such a nerd,” Asami said with a laugh and smiled gratefully at her friend. 

“I won’t deny it,” her friend gave with a shrug. “So tell me about this goddess.”

Asami slumped in her chair, bagel and fruit forgotten. “Ok I don’t have much time but honestly, Opal, just wow. I went to palpate her spleen and her fucking  _ abs _ . I don’t think I’ve ever felt such tight abs like that I literally had to tell her to relax her stomach because I couldn’t feel anything past those bricks.”

“You’re so gay,” Opal said as she shook her head lovingly. 

Asami stood up and straightened her attendings coat, leaning down to flick Opal’s badge. “I am bisexual, thank you very much. You better get back to your rounds, intern.” And she strode off with a strut. 

“I’m a resident!” Opal called and laughed as Asami just waived her hand in the air. Little shit. 

//

Everything felt a little surreal as she walked into the sterile OR with her nurse. It was cold and a little brighter than she expected but she felt oddly at ease as the few people around her began setting up the equipment. She was told that this would be an easy thing but Korra didn't think that she would feel ok until after it was over and she was out of this scratchy gown. 

She was directed to lay on the thin bed in the middle of the room and the nurse gave her a pillow to prop her head up on as she was told to lie on her side. She watched in interest as everyone did their jobs and smiled when she saw those green eyes enter the room.

Dr. Sato sat down on the stool next to the bed and rolled slightly over to Korra, who was now completely covered in sterile cloth. 

“You doing alright, Korra?” An annoying question, but it always has to be asked. 

“Guess I’m doing alright for someone about to get two huge needles poked into her bone,” Korra gave with a lopsided grin. 

Dr. Sato leaned down slightly to get more eye level with her, keeping her sterile hands away from anything. “That’s what I like to hear. So I know we’ve gone over this but I want to run it through again and see if you have any questions, alright?”

Korra nodded. 

Green eyes crinkled in a smile over her mask. “Ok I’m going to numb your pelvis as much as I can before I perform the bone marrow aspiration and biopsy. The aspiration is a smaller needle where we just get some liquid marrow samples, but the biopsy is where we use a larger needle and we’re going to take a small piece of your bone and marrow. Do you have any questions for me?”

“How bad is it going to hurt?” She’s watched shows where people get this done and they always scream. She researched this procedure of course and the internet says that there will be ‘momentary pain,’ so she wants to know which it will be. She can handle pain, she just likes to be prepared. 

“I’ve never had it done, so I can’t give you an exact pain scale,” Dr. Sato said truthfully, “but it will hurt. Some people take pain better than others, so it all rests on your tolerance. You wanted me to be honest with you so I’m trying, but I will also try my best to make you comfortable, ok?”

“Thanks, Dr. Sato, I appreciate the honesty.” Korra thought for a moment that the doctor wanted to say something but she just nodded after a pause and stood up. 

A nurse pushed something into her IV while Dr. Sato slipped into gloves and a sterile gown. Korra couldn’t help but to think of how hot she looked in those surgery scrubs and she smiled, feeling suddenly light. 

“Ok, Korra,” Dr. Sato began, “we gave you some medicine to keep you relaxed. I’m going to give you a local anesthetic so you’re going to feel a few pinches.”

Korra just rested her head on her arms as she felt the doctor squeeze the side of her hip and the unmistakable pinch of a few shots. Shots and needles had never bothered her, something that she was thankful for as Korra felt she was about to be very acquainted with them over the course of her treatment. 

A different doctor, she thinks, took the seat that Dr. Sato had vacated a few minutes before. She was masked as well, but had pretty green eyes too. Not as pretty as her doctor, but they were playful and sweet. 

“Hi, Korra, I’m Dr. Beifong,” the doctor said sweetly. “I’ll be right here if you need a hand to hold onto, ok?” 

_ Wait, what? _ “Beifong, like Lin Beifong?”

“You know my Auntie Lin?” Dr. Beifong asked brightly. 

“Yea, my best friend is a detective,” Korra replied with a smile. 

Dr. Beifong looked up for a moment then back at Korra. “Small world then. We’re going to get started though, ok? Remember I’m right here if you need a hand.”

She nodded, not really seeing a reason why she would hold a complete strangers hand, but it was a nice thought. 

“Ok, Korra. This will be quick so be strong for me, alright?” 

“Yea,” she gave with an effort and felt the pressure of the needle piercing her skin. It was an uncomfortable feeling, and when the needle hit her bone there was some pain but she expected it. 

“How are you holding up, Korra?” 

“I’m good,” she still reached for Dr. Beifong’s hand, though. Korra just thought that she might have gotten herself worked up about the pain and needed something to bring her back down and those gentle eyes made her feel safe. 

“Good,” Dr. Sato replied. “Last one and we’re done.”

This one hurt just the same until the doctor had to twist back and forth to break off a piece of her bone. Korra squeezed the hand she was holding at how uncomfortable it felt, but the feeling was gone as quick as it came. 

“Sorry about your hand,” she said sheepishly as she released the woman from her death grip. 

“Don’t worry about it, I’m glad I could be here for you.” She got up and walked away with a smile. 

She watched the few people in the room walk around and do their business, covering her up and putting supplies back on trays. Dr. Sato came back to the stool in front of her. 

“You did really well, Korra,” she said. “You’re going to be sore for a little bit so we’re going to have a nurse here wheel you over to recovery for a little bit so you can rest, ok? I’ll come check on you before you’re discharged.”

“Thank you again, Dr. Sato. It didn’t hurt as much as I thought.”

The doctor had that look like she wanted to say something again but just smiled. “I’m glad to hear it. I’ll see you in a bit.” And then she was off, removing her gloves and gown before walking her cute, scrubs covered butt out of the room and Korra sighed. 

Recovery was boring, she was sore, and she kind of had to pee. After what seemed like forever, Dr. Beautiful walked into the recovery room. 

“Korra! How are you feeling?” Was it even legal to smile that brightly? 

“I’m definitely sore, but I think I’m good to go.”

“Sounds good to me,” she replied. “So take it easy for the next day or so, no bath for at least a day and if you need to shower just put something like a waterproof bandage over the sight. You can take acetaminophen or ibuprofen for the pain and ice packs help too. I should have the results in a few days so I’ll see you at your appointment on Monday?”

Korra just nodded, feeling the ache creep through her body. 

“Do you have someone who can give you a ride?” Dr. Hot-o asked. Korra laughed at her own joke, and the doctor raised that perfect brow again in question. 

“No, I was just going to Uber home,” Korra said meekly. “Not that I don’t have friends, it's just...I haven’t told anyone yet. Only Tenzin knows and he legally can’t tell anyone.”

Green eyes bore into her again, a common theme. “I think we should call Tenzin, you look really sore.”

“Are you saying I look like shit, Doc?” Korra threw her a playful smile as a distraction but it wasn’t working. “There’s no way around you when you’re determined, huh?”

“Nope. I’m going to call him.”

//

She looked at the paper in front of her and read the words over and over again. Those few little words had been the catalyst for her desire to become an oncologist, so why did they pierce her skin so harshly like this? She had seen this diagnosis time and time again in her years both as a resident and an attending. So what made this so different? 

Achingly blue eyes and a cocky smile is what made it different, and she tried so hard to not admit it. Even with their few brief interactions Asami was damn near ready to risk it all for her patient.  _ Her patient _ , she had to keep reminding herself, not just Korra, Korra her patient with cancer. 

“Hey, Asami, I brought-Asami?”

She raised her head from her desk and looked at the woman who entered her office. Opal deflated at the look on Asami’s face and walked towards her gently. 

“What happened?” Opal asked. 

“Just, look.” She turned the file around for Opal to see. 

“Korra? Oh....ohhh,” Opal said in a hushed voice. “Oh, Asami. Honey, I don’t know what to say. What do you need me to do?”

“I need a bath and whiskey, Op.” Asami replied and leaned back in her chair to face the ceiling. “And remind me to kill Tenzin next time I see him.”

Opal leaned over the desk and grasped her hand. “Head home and get some rest, ok? I’m on-call tonight but you can FaceTime me if you want to talk about it.”

“Thanks, but I think I’ll be ok.” Asami said with a half smile. “I’m just having a hard time being professional on this case and this didn’t help one bit. I just need—I just need to focus.”

“She’ll be ok, Asami. Medicine has come a long way since...” Opal paused, “she’ll be ok. You’re the best there is, and you have me too.”

“Thanks, Opal."

As she downed her amber whisky later that night in a tub where the water had grown cold, Asami remembered loving amber eyes and billowing black hair, just like her own. The years had passed into double digits long ago but she could never forget how strong those eyes had remained through it all, even when the black hair was gone and there was nothing left to fight for. 

She was determined to help fight this time. She was able to...this time. 

//

“Korra, the cancer you have is called Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia, or ALL for short.”

This was always one of the worst parts, was informing the patient of their diagnosis, treatment options, and life expectancy. Asami was beyond glad to see how those blue eyes had changed from the first time she had met Korra. Before, she was scared and unsure, but now she can see the fighter. 

She continued. “So what’s happening is that your body is overproducing lymphocytes which are overcrowding your blood with immature white blood cells. This is an issue because one, it doesn’t leave much room for healthy red blood cells and platelets and two, immature white blood cells decrease your body’s ability to fight off infection.”

“Ok,” Korra said and rubbed her hands together like she was plotting something. “So what do we do?” Asami couldn’t help herself and smiled wide at the enthusiasm, which made Korra smile too and  _ wow _ . “What? What’s the smile for?”

“I’m just glad to see the change from a week and a half ago until now,” Asami replied. “Forgive me if this is a bit unprofessional but you look ready to kick some ass.”

“Oh I’m definitely ready,” Korra said with a lopsided grin. “And you can be as unprofessional with me as you want, I won’t tell anyone.” Her grin turned into a cocky smirk. 

Shit. That was hot. Too hot. 

Asami tried and failed to push away the slight blush and hoped that her patient,  _ her patient, _ wouldn’t see. She had spent an unnecessary amount of time in her bathtub last night repeating the doctor’s oath to herself, reminding herself why she was here. Yes, Korra was attractive and fun, but she had to have boundaries. 

“So like I said before,” she jumped back on track, “this isn’t going to be a walk in the park. I’m putting you on a chemotherapy regimen, then most likely some radiation therapy, and a bone marrow transplant if we can find a suitable donor.”

“Which one is the worst?” Korra asked. 

“They all have their own personal hell,” Asami said as she leaned back in her chair, “but chemo is going to be a long haul. You’ll have to do three different sections of treatment that last various lengths, the last one can take up to 2 years.”

“Right, ok,” she said, eyes still fighting. “I mean I kind of looked up blood cancers even though I didn’t know which kind it was but I trust you more than the internet to tell me how everything is going to be.”

“Yes, and I told you I wouldn’t sugar coat anything for you.”

“Exactly,” she said with a smile. “So a bone marrow donor, is there like a donor bank for that or something?”

Asami flicked her pen a few times before sitting up straight. “There is a list of donors, but usually a family member is the most likely to be a match. Unlike regular blood with few different types, bone marrow is very specific and you need a really good match for your body to accept the donor marrow. It says in your file that you don’t have any siblings, and I don’t mean to pry, but would your parents consider testing to see if they’re a match?”

Korra fidgeted a little across the desk. “I’m sure they will, it’s just...”

“You haven’t told them yet, huh?”

“No,” Korra said and deflated. “I didn’t want to tell anyone until I knew exactly what it was and had a treatment plan established. They’re going to have so many questions.”

Asami nodded in understanding. It was already hard having to explain to a patient how everything would go, but having to explain to your family potential outcomes? That’s beyond scary. “I could send Tenzin your file? He might be able to help you answer any questions your family will have.” 

Blue eyes perked up at that. “Actually that’s a really good idea!”

“It’s settled then,” Asami said with a smile. “I’ll send them over once we’re done here.”

//

She couldn’t tell if her nausea was from the ferry ride, cancer, or the fact that she was on her way to Air Temple Island to tell everyone she loved that she had cancer. She itched the medical tape that was covering the new PICC line in her chest. It was where all of her medicine would go so they didn’t have to keep doing new IV’s in her arm every week. 

That had been a simple procedure, just like the bone marrow aspiration/biopsy. This one hurt less and they had given her some more medicine that had made her giddy, which was probably why she felt no shame in watching Dr. Sato for the entire 45 minute process. Watching how her perfect eyebrows scrunched together slightly in concentration and how green eyes would flit up to her own and that soft voice would ask,  _ how are you doing, Korra? Are you feeling ok? _

She may or may not have said something stupid along the lines of  _ ‘I’m always ok when I’m with you,’ _ but whatever. Drugs. 

Tenzin’s wife and four kids, Korra’s parents, Mako and Bolin, were all going to find out tonight and her stomach gurgled at the anticipation. She had been to family dinner Friday twice since she had found out and it had been killing her to keep it away from everyone. 

Her parents still lived in the Southern Water Tribe but they had just so happened to be making a trip up here for the weekend, so Korra had invited the brothers along as well just to rip the proverbial band-aid and get it all over with at once. 

She had planned to bring it up over dinner, but the second her mom saw her she knew there was no chance. Her mom was too good. 

“Korra? Sweetheart,” her mom looked at Tenzin who tried to maintain a straight face, “honey you’re so pale. What’s going on?”

“Are Mako and Bolin here yet?” Korra deflected, flinching at her mom’s hurt tone. Damn moms and their damn ability to read their kids. 

“They’re with Meelo,” Pema said as she stood next to her mom but looked at Tenzin. “Should I round everyone up for some tea?”

/

“I have cancer.” Band-aid, ripped. 

Bolin spit out his tea. 

Mako fainted. 

She kept her eyes in her lap because she couldn’t bear to see the look on her parents’ faces. 

“It’s called acute lymphoblastic leukemia. I was scared at first,” she continued in the shocked silence, “but I can do this. I’m going to fight it and it will be ok. I can do this.” She finally looked up and looked around at her family. 

There wasn’t a dry eye in the room, save for maybe Rohan who was 6 and didn’t understand what cancer was yet. Her mom got up slowly and walked over to wrap her in a tight hug, then suddenly everyone was in on it. 

“Ok careful,” Korra said when Bolin joined and squeezed hard. “I’m very sore and I bruise easily now.”

“So what’s the plan?” Her dad finally said gruffly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how it works in other countries but residents are doctors who have graduated from med school but are still in training in their chosen specialty and attendings are full-fledged doctors.
> 
> Acetaminophen - tylenol  
> Ibuprofen - advil 
> 
> PICC line - peripherally inserted central catheter, aka where the medicine goes so they don't poke your arm every time.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mention of vomiting but it really isn't descriptive, so I wouldn't worry if it normally bothers you.

“Ready?” Dr. Sato asked. 

“Born ready,” Korra replied. It was Monday, day one of treatment. She was in a cozy room in the hospital, tucked up into a warm chair and had a few things at her disposal for entertainment. 

Dr. Sato smiled. “I’m going to hook up the IV to your PICC line for the chemo concoction, and then you have to take the last of your antibiotics and steroids by mouth.”

“Sounds good.”

“I know we’ve gone over all the medication and the side effects,” she began as she hung the IV bag, “but do you have any other questions?”

Korra thought for a moment. “How quickly will I feel the side effects from the chemo?”

“It’s different in everyone,” always a lame answer, but true. “You’re fit and have a lot of muscle so it will probably travel through you quickly.”

So she’s noticed the muscles? Korra had worn a tank top today, her usual, so when the doctor handed her the other medicine to take by mouth she flexed as she tossed them down her throat and drank the water. 

She’ll just tell herself she saw green eyes follow the movement closely. 

“These sessions get pretty boring,” Dr. Sato said after Korra finished swallowing, “so you can bring some visitors but after a few weeks to months your immune system is going to be very low, so it would be wise to keep as many people away from you as possible.”

“But you’ll be here, right?” She didn’t mean to sound so hopeful, but damn. Not even three weeks of this woman being her doctor and Korra was hooked. She’s a professional, stop it. 

Dr. Sato tilted her head and sighed. “I won’t always be able to be here, but I’ll try my best. I actually have to go right now, but I or someone else will be by soon to check on you, ok?”

Korra nodded somewhat dejectedly. “Ok. Thank you again, Dr. Sato. I’ll see you soon then.”

Green eyes softened and gave her that look again for a moment. “You can call me Asami. We’re going to be seeing a lot of each other now and Dr. Sato gets to be a mouthful.”

“Ok, Asami,” Korra said with a brilliant smile. “I’ll see you around.”

Asami left and Korra sat back happily into her chair, just taking the time she had to think about how damn pretty Asami was. Spirits, even her name was pretty! It definitely wasn’t a great idea to have a crush on your doctor, but at this point Korra couldn’t contain it anymore. A buzz from her phone broke her from her thoughts. 

_ Mom (8:23am): good luck today sweetie! Your dad and I are thinking about you and we’re so proud of how strong you are! We wish we could be there but we love you so much and we’ll talk to you later. _

She sighed and snuggled back into her chair. She could feel the cold seeping into her chest from the medicine and suddenly hated the fact that she had told everyone not to come with her this first day, that she wanted to face it alone. 

It had taken some time that night after she let her secret out. Everyone had so many questions and they eventually had to break out the old talking stick so everyone could take turns. It had been beyond helpful to have Tenzin there to deflect medical type questions onto and by the end of the night everyone had all the information they wanted. 

She laid back and closed her eyes, attempting to meditate like Tenzin was always trying to get her to do. She tried not to panic at the thought of everything, and she had been doing really well after her initial shock, but it was real now. She was hooked up with an IV port in her chest and poison dripping into her body to fight off the poison that was already home in her bones and blood. 

If her anxiety got the better of her Korra had a button she could press that would call for a nurse, but she wasn’t there yet. She had to be strong, she couldn’t panic on day one. She had months and years of this to go, she could be strong. 

She didn’t know how long had passed when her stomach started to cramp. Bouts of nausea were not unknown to her lately, so she grabbed the pan on the table next to her and kept it in her lap, ready if she needed it. Nausea and vomiting were to be expected from the chemo, which sucked. Korra hated throwing up and not that anyone really likes it but it’s just annoying. This whole thing was annoying. 

But she’s lucky, in a sense. She has an amazing team of doctors on her side led by the green eyed goddess who is also apparently a super genius. She understood the moment Asami walked in the room that day what Tenzin had meant about not bringing up her age. Korra didn’t know how old she was, but Asami really was young to be an attending physician. She figured that she had plenty of time to find out how she did it, so she would just be patient. 

She was also lucky that she had such a strong support system behind her. Not just with her family and friends, but her team and teammates as well. Playing soccer professionally had always been a dream of hers and when the Republic City Rebels had signed her during her last semester at RCU, she could have cried. She did, she definitely did cry. The two years she had been on the team were some of the best in her life, an experience that made her constantly speechless. There was really no way to know how her body will be after this fight is over, but the Rebels were giving her complete support through everything and her spot will be there when she’s done. 

_ If _ she’s done. 

She was blocked from having the terrible thoughts of not making it through when a knock sounded on the door. 

“Korra?” It was Asami. She wasn’t in her coat like earlier and her hair was pulled back into a low bun; her surgery hair. “How are you feeling?”

“My stomach hurts,” she replied as Asami sat on the table in front of her. 

“No vomiting I see,” she peeked into the pan, “any extra nausea besides what you’ve had?”

“A bit more, yea.”

Asami nodded and stood up to check the bag. “Ok well you’re almost done here, you’re doing great. I have to go back but I just wanted to check in on you since it's your first day. A nurse should be in here soon to fix everything up and I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Did you come out of surgery to check on me?” Korra asked before she could walk out. 

Asami stopped in her stride and looked back. “How did you know I was in surgery?” That damn raised eyebrow. 

“You have your surgery hair,” she smiled and pointed to the back of her own head. 

“Oh, well,” Asami began and reached for her neck but stopped. “Opal is completely capable of handling things for a minute.”

“Opal?”

Asami laughed. “Dr. Beifong, sorry. I do have to get back now but I’ll see you tomorrow ok, Korra?” She waved and left the room. 

Korra wondered vaguely when the hell she had started to be into scrubs. 

She knew, of course, but damn. 

//

“I’ll do yours if you do mine.”

“Bolin you don’t have to buzz your hair off for me,” Korra stated plainly and ruffled his messy black hair. 

She had asked him to come over early before her session today. At week three of treatment, her hair had started falling out in clumps and she was over it. It was worse to watch it all fade away in spots than to just cut it all off, and that’s why Bolin was here. 

“Of course I do! Solidarity!” 

He was too precious for his own good and Korra could only shake her head. “Whatever you want, Bo, but can we get this over with? We have to leave soon.”

“Right.”

She put her hair into a ponytail and took a deep breath before chopping it off. She couldn’t look in the mirror, but the difference in weight was immediate. She put the hair in a bag to be donated for a little kid who deserved a wig, she didn’t need it anymore. They did. 

She took her shirt off so it wouldn’t get caked in pokey hair and sat on a stool in the middle of the bathroom. Korra ran her hands through her now short hair a few times for a last feel before nodding to her best friend. They didn’t speak as the shaver buzzed. It could have been a somber moment, but she felt lighter with each pass of the shaking blade. When he was finished, Bolin wiped off what little hairs he could from her shoulders and wrapped her in a soft hug from behind. 

He’s gotten a lot better at it, the soft hugs. 

She felt ok, in a sense, but everything was different. She was sore all the time and the chemo had taken away her taste and now her hair. But she was strong, she could get through this. 

She stood up and they both looked at her through the mirror. Korra had always thought it would be cool to shave her head someday, but she never thought that a cancer diagnosis would come along with it. Besides her paling skin, she still looked like herself, now just with a badass haircut. 

“Thanks, Bo. You did a good job.” She rubbed the stubble and smiled at how it tickled her hand. “Did you really want to do yours?”

He clapped his hands eagerly. “You know I do!” He mirrored her earlier motions and took off his shirt and sat in the chair. She choked up a little with each pass of the buzzer she threaded through his now fading hair. She had scoffed at him earlier but now her heart swelled at his proclamation of solidarity to her. She loved him so much, and Mako too even though he wasn’t here at the moment, and she just felt so damn lucky to have friends like this. 

She finished and rubbed as much of the little stubbles off before patting his shoulder. He stood up to check himself out in the mirror and then swept her into another gentle hug. He really was just so damn pure. 

“We look awesome!” He boasted and flexed, earning a strong laugh in reply. 

Korra grabbed her phone and Bolin knew the drill. She wanted to document all of the stages through this process, especially something like this. She smiled with a thumbs up, PICC line poking out of her sports bra, all of her hair strewn about the floor. They also took a picture together in the mirror, for solidarity. 

“I think you look cool,” Bolin said jovially. “Go get changed and I’ll clean all this up so we can go.”

//

She curled into her chair with a blanket while Bolin chattered away about his upcoming work. He was trying to breakout into the mover industry and his idle, passionate musings always made her smile. 

It was easier for them to access her PICC if she wore a tank top but Korra had been getting colder than usual lately so she’s started to bring a blanket with her. It’s nice for the times when someone can’t join her, she can just snuggle up and take a nap and try not to vomit. 

The vomiting had...sucked. There’s no easier way to say it than that. She’s had a few embarrassing occasions where Asami had been in the room but it was quickly taken care of and Korra was told to never feel ashamed of it. Well of course Asami would be good at it, she’s around it all the time. That didn’t make Korra any less objected to the idea of having her crush watch the motion. But soft green eyes had always been there to tell her it’s ok, and that was ok. 

A knock. “Korra?” It was Opal, and yes she was allowed to call her Opal now too. “You went for the shave I see?”

Korra reached for her bald head. “Yea I was tired of watching it go slowly. This is my best friend Bolin, by the way.” Korra gestured to Bolin who looked a little gobsmacked at the doctor. 

“Nice to meet you Bolin,” Opal said. “I see you went for the buzz too?” She nodded in appreciation, “that’s a really nice gesture. I’m Dr. Beifong, by the way, but you can call me Opal.” 

“Wait, Beifong as in-“

“Lin’s her aunt,” Korra cut in. She guessed she could have told him that. 

“Cool! My brother is a detective for RCPD.”

“I’m starting to make the connections,” Opal said with a smile, learning slowly who all of Korra’s friends and relatives were. She walked over to hang up the bag and went to connect the line. 

“Ready?” 

“Always.” Like she had a choice. 

“Atta girl,” she replied and hung up the bag. “Asami is away at a conference for a few days so you’re stuck with me.”

“I’ve had worse,” Korra said with a smirk and Opal rolled her eyes. 

They’ve gotten pretty close over the last few weeks, it would kind of be hard not to when she’s in here 5 days out of the week for a few hours. They keep it semi-professional, but Korra knew that she would definitely be friends with Opal outside of the hospital. She was fun and sweet, but also had an uncanny knack of being a pain in the ass when it came down to it. For as sweet as she was, Opal got shit done and she did what was necessary to do so. 

“I’ll be back in a bit, alright?” Opal asked and Korra nodded. “It was nice meeting you, Bolin.”

“Yea you too!” He called as she left the room. “Korra I need to visit more often if she’s your doctor.”

“Oh so you only want to come hang out with me for the hot doctor?” Korra asked with a grin.

Bolin laughed. “Says the girl who also has a crush on her own hot doctor.”

She tilted her head in defeat. “Fair point.”

//

“By yourself today, Korra?” Opal asked as she came into the room. Korra was already wrapped in her blanket in the corner of her chair. 

“Yea everyone was busy today,” she replied with a sigh. “I also don’t want to bother anyone, you know? They all still have lives and work.”

Opal hung up the bag and hooked it into her line. “I don’t think they would be here if they didn’t want to support you, Korra. And you know that pretty soon you won’t be able to have many visitors too.”

“Yea I guess you’re right,” Korra said with a soft smile. Her immune system was steadily decreasing with the chemo so eventually she wasn’t going to be to have anyone with her. 

“I don’t have anywhere to be at the moment, want me to keep you some company?”

Korra perked up at the offer now having felt pretty silly for not bringing anyone. “That would be great, Opal. Thank you!”

“Of course,” the doctor replied and pulled up a chair. “How are things with you? Asami wants me to let her know how it’s all going here while she’s away.”

The thought of Asami checking in on her even when she was away made Korra’s heart flutter a little bit. But she was just a patient, Asami was just being a good doctor. 

“It’s all been pretty steady,” Korra offered. “My tastes are still changing and my mouth is starting to hurt.” That had been one of the weirdest parts, was the change of taste. Foods she used to love she could barely even smell without feeling nauseous now. Well, she was nauseous about everything, but still. 

“Good I’m glad that it’s a steady change,” Opal said with a smile. 

“Can you tell me about Asami?” Korra’s curiosity finally got the better of her. “Tenzin told me not to bring up her age, but I just want to know...how?”

Opal burst out laughing. “I’m sorry, it’s just really sweet. Most people ask a lot sooner but you’ve held out for a while.” She settled back in her chair and laced her fingers together. “Short story is that she was a child prodigy. Graduated high school at 12, college at 15 and med school at 18. She finished her residency at 22 and has been an attending for 3 years now.”

So she’s 25. Ok, so a little over a year older since Korra just turned 24. “Wow.” She said in awe. “That’s amazing, I kind of feel inadequate. I mean I finished college but I kind of have always been a jock and didn’t pay much attention in school.”

“It doesn’t make her any better than you, and she would tell you so herself if you ever asked.” Opal waved off her concern. “Everyone has different abilities that make them who they are, and it doesn’t make anyone better or worse than you. Asami may be able to cure cancer but put her on a soccer field like you and she would curl into a ball.”

That made Korra laugh so hard she had to vomit, and Opal was right there to rub her back and help her through it. 

“I’m sorry, that’s been happening more lately,” Korra said weakly. 

“Don’t be sorry, really,” Opal replied. “I know the feeling of when it starts to get worse.”

Korra raised her brows in shock. “You do?”

Opal nodded. “Yep. Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma when I was 6. I had a relapse my sophomore year of college but so far so good since then. If those hadn’t set me back a bit in school I would be close to being an attending like Asami.” She finished with a smirk. 

“So you’re a child prodigy too?” Korra asked with a smile. She knew Opal was her age, but she had never thought about what kind of schooling it took to be a doctor.

“In a sense I guess?” Opal said with a shrug. “I was raised in Zaofu and they have a different kind of school system so I took college courses while in high school and finished a couple years early.”

Korra was a little gobsmacked at the thought of her doctors being actual geniuses. She reminded herself to thank Tenzin again for the wonderful recommendation. Her entire team of doctors and nurses here had been so incredibly helpful and supportive. She couldn’t imagine going through something like this and not getting the utmost care. 

“Is that why you wanted to be a doctor?” Korra asked. “Because you had cancer when you were little?”

Opal hummed. “I guess that’s what pushed me to be an oncologist, but I’ve always wanted to be a doctor.”

“Do most doctors have a back story of what makes them choose a specialty?” Like Asami, perhaps. 

“That’s a yes and no as well,” Opal replied. “Some people have a reason they choose their specialty or sometimes they go into med school thinking they’ll go into one but eventually fall in love with something completely different.”

Opal’s pager blared and she got up quickly. “I’m so sorry, Korra, but I have to go. Zhu Li will be by in a bit for you!” And then she was gone. 

Korra had gotten better at being here alone since that first day when she almost had a panic attack. She knew what to expect now when the medicine started and as much as she loved having her friends here with her, the time alone gave her a chance to reflect on a lot. 

First and foremost of course was the fact that cancer was a bitch. It sucked, truly, and there really wasn’t a better way to describe it other than sucking. She felt lucky to be an adult at least, since during some of her walks around the oncology ward had shown way too many kids for her liking. Kids were pure and innocent, they shouldn’t have to go through any of this. 

Korra’s parents were strong and supportive, doing whatever she needed even though they had to travel back home for a while. But the parents in here with their kids? That’s a different kind of strong. It made her beyond thankful that if she did have to do this that at least she was older and wouldn’t have to put her parents through so much trouble. She could do a lot of this on her own, if she wanted to. 

But then again she didn’t have to, not with her group of friends. The brothers and her team have been amazing. Even when no one can come to one of her appointments they’re always texting or calling to check in on her and Korra can’t help but to feel her heart squeeze with the affection she has for all of these people. 

Honestly though, a lot of her free time during these appointments usually winds up being about bright green eyes and burgundy lips. Even though Asami seemed to always be busy with something, she made time to see Korra and check in on her, even for just a minute. 

Some days she didn’t have to go so quickly and they could sit and talk, which had been really nice. Not only was Asami beautiful and intelligent, but she’s cool as hell too. Korra somehow got it out of her one day that she liked to work on her car and motorcycle when she had free time. It was a little rare that she got to do so, but she could see Asami’s eyes light up a bit talking about it. Their conversations were usually about Korra so it had been nice to get the doctor to open up about herself for once and she had been so passionate about motors Korra’s face had hurt from smiling at the end. 

Korra liked her, bottom line. She liked to just think she had a chance, it helped her pass the time, but there was no way. Not only does she not know if Asami was even into girls, but Korra needed to remind herself constantly that she’s Asami’s patient. It wouldn’t be right. 

But will that stop her from probably doing something stupid? Of course not. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just love Bolin, and I love Opal. Who am I kidding, I love them all.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As much as I'm going to keep the medical aspect as real as possible, I will take some liberties for the sake of the story :)

Mako was late, she was in pain, and it was just a really annoying beginning to the day. The brothers had taken turns walking Naga in the morning for her and then would drive Korra to her appointments most days. It had become too strenuous for her to do and they had been glad to help, but today was Mako’s day and he was held up at the precinct. 

She was already late and had to drive herself to the hospital with Mako texting to promise that he will take Naga out when he’s off. 

Which turned into him texting her that he lost his spare key as Korra slumped into her chair. Weekends were hard because she tried to get as much done around her apartment as she could which just led to her being completely exhausted by the end of it. Korra wanted to be annoyed at him losing the key, but he and Bolin were doing so much for her that she just sighed. It wasn’t a big deal, he would just have to come get her own key from her. 

“Korra?” Zhu Li poked her head in the door. “Good morning. How is it today?”

Korra was a little crestfallen that it wasn’t Asami, since it was Monday and Asami was always here for her on Monday’s. Except last week, which had sucked too. 

“It’s pretty bad today,” she said truthfully. “I think I overdid it this weekend.” Zhu Li just looked at her and nodded while she hooked everything up. She was Korra’s favorite nurse, which was somewhat unusual since she didn’t talk much, but it was nice. 

“Any other changes besides fatigue?” She asked plainly. 

“No, just tired.”

Zhu Li nodded again. “Dr. Sato will be a little later today, she had something to take care of so just sit tight and she’ll come check in on you soon.”

Zhu Li was all business, which had been a little awkward at first because Korra likes to shake things up but she hadn’t gotten past the stoic nurse’s wall yet. She had time, though. Nothing but time. 

She reckoned she might have dozed off for a bit because when she woke up Mako was sitting next to her doing a crossword puzzle. 

“Hey, why didn’t you wake me?”

He looked affronted. “You need all the sleep you can get, Kor. I was fine waiting. You haven’t been out long anyway.”

She reached over to grab his hand in thanks when Asami walked in the room. 

“Good morning,” she began as she walked in and stopped when she saw Mako. “Oh, hello. Sorry to keep you waiting, Korra. I had something to take care of.”

“No biggie,” Korra waved her off but noticed that those green eyes weren’t so bright today. “Also, this is Mako, my best friend and also my ex.”

Mako groaned and took his hand back. “Why do you always have to introduce me like that? We dated like, 4 years ago.” He stood to shake Asami’s hand to who looked amused at the introduction. “It’s nice to meet you, but I have to go take care of her beastly dog now.”

“Naga is a big love and you just can’t handle her,” Korra said sweetly, knowing well that her dog seemed to relish in giving Mako big, slobbery kisses. “Also my key is in the bag by the door. Don’t lose that one too, please.”

He flipped her off with a laugh and then was gone with the key. 

“Sorry,” she said to Asami who was looking a little more bright now. “He and I have a weird relationship.”

“I can tell,” she replied and a smirk slid onto her face. “Ex though, huh? Didn’t you tell me you were gay?” Asami’s eyes shot open and she slapped her hand to her mouth. “Spirits, Korra I’m so sorry. That was so unprofessional.”

Korra just laughed, and tried hard to not laugh too much and have a vomit fit again. “It’s ok, Asami, really. I told you that you could be unprofessional with me. I won’t tell.”

“I’m sorry,” she reiterated, “it’s just been one of those mornings, you know?”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Korra asked and gestured to the chair next to her. “You look like you could use a few minutes.”

She paused for a second before nodding and sitting down. “Zhu Li said it’s a bad day today?”

“I’m just sore from the weekend,” Korra replied. “Nothing else has really changed, but you know Monday’s are a little rough for me.”

“Monday’s are always rough,” Asami said with a nod and sagged into her seat. “We lost a kid today, he was 13. Chronic myeloid leukemia. He was one of my first patients I worked with when I started my residency here.”

“I’m so sorry, Asami,” she could see the defeat in those green eyes and she reached over to take her hand without thinking, but Asami gently took it and held on for a moment. 

“Thank you,” she said with a sad smile. “It happens, it’s a part of life and I knew that coming into it but it’s never easy. I just have to sit for a moment and remind myself why I’m here.”

Korra shifted in her chair to look at Asami better. “Opal was telling me about some doctors and how they chose their specialty. Do you have a story like she does?”

Green eyes bore into hers for a moment and Asami sighed. “Today is not the day for that story, Korra, I’m sorry.”

“No! It’s ok, I didn’t mean to pry. Take all the time you need, Asami. I’m not going anywhere.” She gave a small smile and pointed to her attached PICC line.

Asami huffed out a laugh and opened her mouth to reply but her pager went off. “Sorry, Korra, I have to go but I’ll be back when it’s time to go.” She patted Korra’s hand and was out the door. 

She wondered what kind of story Asami could have to make her look that sad. 

//

The next day her parents were finally back and able to be at her appointment. Her mom brought her a fur lined hat from the Southern Water Tribe and Korra wondered why she hadn’t thought of a warm beanie earlier. 

She also wondered how she was a month into treatment and Asami apparently hadn’t met a few very important people in Korra’s life. 

She laid back in her chair with her warm hat and blanket, happy to enjoy listening to her parents chat about things with her doctor. Asami was very good at keeping up a conversation, which she assumed had to do with the fact that she interacted with a lot of parents of sick kids, so she was in her element. 

Her dad made a joke which had Korra laughing hard enough to, of course, start to vomit. Which totally killed the mood, but what could she do? Her parents tried to help but she pushed them away and told them to get out while Asami helped her. It probably wasn’t fair, but they were already struggling a lot at not being able to be here all the time for their daughter and Korra didn’t want them to have to see this, the bad part. Not yet. 

“I’m sorry, Asami,” Korra groaned when it was over and the doctor squatted in front of her. 

“How many times do I have to tell you to not be sorry?” 

“Probably every time,” she said with a lopsided smile. 

Asami shook her head with a small laugh. “Sit tight, I’m going to go talk to your parents ok?”

//

“How is she?” Senna asked once Asami had closed the door behind her. Korra’s mom was strong, she could see it mirrored in those blue eyes they shared. For as burly and brawny as Tonraq was, Asami could tell that he was a complete softy for his wife and daughter. 

“She’s actually doing very well,” Asami said. “The vomiting, while not glamorous, is just a general side effect. Korra has been responding really well to her treatment so far and now it’s just trying to keep her safe and keep the levels where they’re at.”

“Keep her safe, what does that mean?” Tonraq asked. 

Asami sighed, it was a good question and one that parents always struggled with. “The longer she is on chemotherapy, the less of an immune system she will have. Pretty soon here we will begin to limit the amount of people Korra can have visit because she will be at risk of contracting infections much easier than you and I.”

“She mentioned something about a bone marrow transplant,” Senna added, “when do we get tested to see if we’re a match?”

Asami nodded, they had obviously been attentive with the treatment process. “We won’t know if she will need a bone marrow transplant until the end of round 2, so a few more months. When the time comes it’s just a simple blood test to see if you’re a match.”

“You’re going to take good care of her, right?” Tonraq said with watery eyes. “She’s our little girl.”

She stood up straighter. “I promise I will do everything I can to make sure Korra beats this.”

Asami was promptly swept into a crushing hug, one that she tried not to admit that she wanted to continue for longer than was generally necessary. 

//

Asami walked faster towards Korra’s room as the noise increased and she didn’t knock like she normally did before entering. When she opened the door she was greeted to the sight of probably 10 people in the small room. 

“What the fuck,” she whispered, and of course no one could hear her because they seemed to be having a mini party of some sorts. She locked eyes with Korra who was seated on her regular chair and now looked incredibly sheepish at Asami. 

Busted. 

“What the hell is going on?” She asked loudly, making all of the girls in the room turn towards her. 

“Asami!” Korra said happily, trying to be suave. “These are some of my teammates. Team, this is my wonderful doctor, Dr. Sato.”

“It’s very nice to meet you all,” Asami began, “but there’s a limit of 2 guests per room so I’m sorry but I have to ask most of you to leave.”

“Can we have just a few more minutes?” One of them asked and Asami crossed her arms in thought. 

“I’ll give you 5 minutes, but please don’t hug her,” Asami tried. “Her immune system is very weak,” she looked directly at Korra, “that’s why we have a limit on guests.” 

Korra pouted and she promptly turned to leave. Fuck that was cute. 

When she came back five minutes later all the girls were starting to pack their things up to leave, thankfully. Asami was ready with sanitized wipes for the room. 

“We’ll see you soon, Avatar!” One if them said and turned towards Asami. “Two at a time, of course.”

Asami laughed and waved goodbye and another girl piped up. 

“If I had known the doctors would be this hot I’d get cancer too.”

“Kuvira get out!” Korra cried and pouted again. 

“Just teasing,” Kuvira said with a wink. “Later, Avatar!”

The door shut behind the last of them and Asami started to wipe everything down, both to actually disinfect and because she was mad and needed to calm down. What part of your  _ immune system is wrecked _ does Korra not understand? Was she trying to kill herself?

“I can feel you seething from over here,” Korra said gently and it thawed her angry heart a little. 

“Just give me a minute to calm down, ok?”

Korra didn’t reply but she could feel those blue eyes watching her and she had to wipe down the area around the girl anyway so she turned and sighed. 

“How the hell did all of them get in here anyway?” Her tone was a bit clipped but she’s trying. 

Korra shrugged. “Apparently the security guard at check-in has a daughter who’s a huge Rebels fan, so they took a picture with him and signed a bunch of stuff for his kid.”

She pinched the bridge of her nose. The security guard was going to need a nice talking to about  _ rules _ and why they’re necessary. 

“Asami, I’m sorry, I know it wasn’t the right thing to do and it’s not an excuse but I just missed being around all of them. And that wasn’t even the whole team!”

She pulled the little coffee table closer to Korra as she sat down. “I understand you’re frustrated at not being able to do things, I really do Korra, but we’ve talked about how dangerous it is right now. Even a small infection could kill you, and I really don’t want that to happen.”

“I know, I’m an idiot.” She slumped back in her chair and closed her eyes. 

“You’re not an idiot for wanting people you love around you,” Asami stated plainly as she wiped Korra’s hands down. “You’re an idiot for doing it dangerously.”

Korra opened her eyes and quirked a brow. “That wasn’t very professional of you.”

“You told me I didn’t need to be,” she said with a shrug. “I’m just trying to accommodate my patient’s needs.”

They laughed and before Asami could take her hand away Korra grabbed it in her own. 

“Asami I really am sorry, it won’t happen again.”

She squeezed gently. “Thank you.”

//

_ *911–room 204* _

Her stomach fell out of her ass and then she was running. She never runs.  _ Fuck. _

She burst through the door and Opal already had Korra in a wheelchair ready to move. “What happened?”

“Her temperature is 101.3 and her chest hurts. Isolation is meeting me down the hall with a bed.”

Asami nodded and rolled the IV as Opal pushed the wheelchair. Korra tried to hold her head up but the sudden movements made her dizzy and she had to lean against her hands. 

“You’re going to be ok, Korra,” Asami cooed, but this is her least favorite part. Infection. It’s common but she hates it with every fiber of her being. 

The isolation team wasn’t far down the hall with the bed for Korra. She moved the IV to the proper side of the bed before helping Opal. 

“Korra can you stand?” Opal asked and Korra tried but threw up into the pan on her lap. 

“Oh fuck this, here,” Asami handed the vomit pan to Opal then tucked an arm under Korra’s legs, held her behind the back and picked her up. She tried not to notice the heat radiating off her patient’s body. The isolation team tried to help but they were just getting in her way. “Move!”

They all backed off and Asami placed Korra in the bed, who was looking at her with wide, red-stained eyes. “You’re going to be ok, Korra. I’ll see you in a minute.” She turned towards the team. “I want bloodwork and give her fluids and a bag of 500mg azithromycin.” They nodded and pushed Korra away towards her new room. Fuck. 

“What happened?” She turned on Opal who looked fearful. Not at Asami, but the situation in general. 

“Zhu Li noticed that she didn’t look good so she took her temperature and it was 100.4 and she paged me and by the time I got there it was 101.3. Korra said her chest hurt and she was more achy than normal.”

“Damn it,” she muttered. “Ok, go make sure they rush her labs and call radiology and have them get a portable X-ray up here. I’m going to kill her and her teammates if she comes out of this.”

Opal put her hand on Asami’s shoulder. “Relax, Asami. We can do this. Korra needs you to be level headed right now.”

She took a deep breath and relaxed. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I was just so mad the other day and of course now she probably has pneumonia. I just thought she listened better.”

Opal tutted and sighed. “People make mistakes, Sams. But we’re prepared for this, so go scrub down for isolation and I’ll get everything else.”

And this was why she needed Korra to be careful in the first place. Why she needed all her patients on this regimen to be careful, was the fact that being in isolation was particularly shitty for a lack of a better term. Patients were stuck in a bed all alone and weren’t allowed visitors. The doctors and nurses who treated them were barely even supposed to come in contact. They were isolated, and it generally took a mental toll on them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> azithromycin - common antibiotic used to treat bacterial pneumonia (and other bacterial infections)


	5. Chapter 5

“I’m sorry.” It was probably the three hundredth time she had said it to Asami in the last two hours and each time the doctor had just glanced at her. 

It had been a blur of motion since Opal took her temperature and whisked her away in a wheelchair. Asami had picked her up like she was nothing, she had all of her clothes cut off besides her sports bra and underwear, and someone had come in to take an X-ray of her chest. Asami had been there the whole time, face mask covering her mouth but those green eyes had been locked onto Korra’s monitor and hardly moved but to look at who entered the room or to give Korra an award winning side eye. 

She just closed her eyes and let the people wash her down while she thought about how stupid she was. Korra had started feeling the pain in her chest last night before bed and figured that she would be fine enough to bring it up casually in the morning. By the time she got to the hospital it had been particularly hard to walk at her regular pace and breath at the same time. She just hadn’t anticipated that something could come on so quickly, but apparently she didn’t want to listen to what her doctors tell her. 

“I’m sorry, Asami.”

“Korra.” It was said with a deep sigh and Korra raised her head to finally meet those green eyes fully, and they were sad. The nurses washing her finished up and nodded before leaving the room, it was just the two of them now. 

“I’m sor-“

Asami shook her head to stop the words. “It’s not your fault, Korra.” Her voice was soft and Korra could tell that she wasn’t mad, just concerned. “It could have been anything, ok? It’s not your fault and I need you to stop being sorry. I don’t need you wearing out your lungs for something you don’t need to say.”

“Ok,” Korra paused and smiled. “I’m sorry for saying sorry so much.”

Asami shook her head and laughed. She grabbed the lone chair in the room and sat down. “Maybe I should just get you a button to push that says ‘sorry’ for you.”

“Not a bad idea,” Korra said and laid back. Everything hurt. 

“Do you want something for the pain?” Asami asked when she noticed Korra’s face. “I know you don’t like to have them a lot but I can start the dose out small.”

Korra fidgeted under her blankets, debating whether to give in or not yet. Pain meds were addictive and made her even more nauseous so she tried to stay away, but sometimes she couldn’t take the pain anymore. 

“Yea I think just a little,” Korra said finally and shivered. “Could you-could you maybe get me more blankets too? They cut my clothes off.”

“Of course. I’ll be right back.”

Asami returned quickly with a pile of warm blankets that she laid cautiously on top of Korra before adding the pain meds to her line. 

“Ok so what I’m giving you should help ease the pain a bit and thankfully you haven’t started coughing yet but this will also help stop that as well.”

“Thank you,” Korra said softly, “and for the blankets as well.”

“You’re welcome.” Asami finished with the line and sat back in the same chair as earlier. “Isolation isn’t going to be fun, Korra. At all. You’re going to be very limited to the people you interact with and you can’t leave this room, so I really need you to keep your head up and push through, ok?”

“I’ll try,” she replied with a grin and Asami shook her head with an equal smile. 

“I need to monitor you for a bit,” Asami said, “are you up to talk a little while or would you rather rest? I can just sit here and work on my research and drone on about it until you fall asleep.”

Korra turned a little in her direction. “What’s your research on?”

Asami searched her face before replying. “I’m trying to isolate the proteins in stem cells from bone marrow so we can give them to anyone for treatment. As of right now they’re very tricky to get a match on and to isolate them might find a cure for blood cancers. We’ve only just begun to scratch the surface with the possibilities of stem cells and I’m trying to see how far they can go.”

“I would actually like to hear about that,” Korra said with a smile, “but I get the feeling you wanted to ask something?” She had caught on pretty quickly that when Asami wanted to ask something that didn’t have to do with cancer she would ask if Korra wanted to talk a bit. It was really cute, trying to play off her curiosity with an open question like that. 

Asami laughed. “I was just wondering why your teammates call you ‘Avatar’?”

Korra smiled wide. “Did you ever watch the show ‘Avatar: the last air bender’ when you were a kid?”

“It was my favorite show,” Asami said with a nod. 

“Really? Mine too!” Korra sat up a little bit in excitement. “Ok we’ll have to talk more about that later but anyway, the nickname. Do you know anything about soccer?”

“Not really, no,” Asami answered sheepishly. 

Korra laughed. “Not a big deal. So basically there are four main positions to play on the field: runner, striker, defender, and goalie. There’s a lot more to it but that’s just an umbrella description of it all, and when I was signed onto the team I was signed as a defender. Long story short they realized after a couple training camps that I could play every position just as well as defender, making me the master of all four ‘elements’ of soccer and now they call me Avatar.” She finished with a shrug. 

“Wow,” Asami said with an approving nod. “That’s really impressive.”

“I  _ am _ pretty impressive,” Korra replied and flexed with a smirk. This was also another reason why she didn’t like taking pain medicine because it lowered her usual inhibitions, and now she was flexing her muscles that have shrunk from disuse in front of her very cute doctor and her blankets have fallen down to expose her sports bra and some stomach. 

Her head was starting to feel fuzzy and maybe that’s why she thought she saw Asami’s eyes flit down her body, but at the moment she couldn’t be bothered with the thought. She laid back gingerly, a little exhausted at the display of muscles that wound up hurting her chest more. Korra looked at her stomach before pulling the sheets all the way up and slumped onto the bed with a wicked pout. 

“What’s wrong? Do you feel ok?” Asami asked with a note of concern. 

“My six pack is gone,” and she pouted deeper, crossing her arms under the sheets. She glanced over at Asami who even though she was wearing a mask that covered her mouth, Korra could see the smile in her eyes. “Don’t laugh at me!”

“I’m not laughing, Korra,” Asami replied with a gentle voice. “But I think you should rest now, ok? I don’t want you to over exert yourself.”

“You’re right,” Korra said and suddenly felt very tired. “Can you talk to me about your research though?”

“Ready to be put to sleep?” Asami asked and they both smiled. “So basically stem cells can come from...”

//

“Here, I brought you this,” Asami said as she pulled her laptop out of her bag. “I have it hooked up to the hospital's good WiFi so you can watch Netflix but also I brought it so you can communicate.”

Korra’s condition had deteriorated over the last three days in isolation and she was weaker than ever. Her pneumonia had proven to be a tricky bitch that planned to squeeze every drop of oxygen out of her lungs. Thankfully she had no cough, but Korra was constantly short of breath and wheezed so much it had been very hard for her to speak. 

Her eyes lit up and Asami could see that wide smile even through the oxygen mask on Korra’s face. There weren’t any TV’s in isolation and even so, hospital channels always sucked anyway. 

Asami tried to show her how to navigate things on the laptop and Korra just watched her with a smile, not paying attention to what she was showing her. 

“What?” Asami asked when Korra gave her a wheezing chuckle. 

_ ‘I know how to use a laptop,’ _ she typed and smirked. 

“Oh, well, some laptops are different and I didn’t know if you had used this one before.” She felt silly all of a sudden because  _ of course _ Korra knew how to use a laptop. 

_ ‘It’s fine, it was sweet. Thank you.’ _

“Not a problem,” she replied and went to check her IV levels to do something with her hands. Korra was holding the screen towards her when she turned around. 

_ ‘Is this your personal laptop?’ _

Asami shrugged. “It’s one I hardly use, so snoop all you want but you won’t find anything naughty on it.” Her eyes went wide and she smacked her hand over her mouth. “Shit I’m so sorry...and now I just cussed. Korra, I’m sorry, that was inappropriate of me to say.”

Korra was laughing so hard her chest was on fire and she couldn’t breath. Asami rushed over to tilt her head back and turned up the oxygen, gently whispering ‘shh it’s ok,’ until Korra calmed down. What started as a laugh turned into a panic attack at not being able to breathe and Asami really felt like shit now. 

“I’m so sorry, Korra.”

Korra put a hand on her chest and took a deep, wheezing breath before grabbing the laptop and again typed. 

‘ _ Just like you tell me to stop saying sorry, you need to stop being sorry for being inappropriate/unprofessional. I don’t care, and that was the funniest shit I’ve heard in a long time.’ _

Asami smiled as she read. “I can try, but I can’t promise anything. Being professional is sort of hardwired into me with patients, especially since I deal with a lot of kids, you know?”

Korra nodded and thought for a second. She flipped the laptop around, checking it out, before typing. _ ‘Why don’t you use this? It’s really nice.’ _

“I have a newer one but also I use the one they provide here the most.” She basically lives at the hospital anyway so she doesn’t have much need for personal laptops.

Korra just shrugged.  _ ‘You monitoring me again today?’ _

“Until I think you’re in the clear, yes.”

_ ‘What about your other patients?’ _

“My team can handle everyone else and they’ll page me if I’m really needed, but you’re my only isolation right now and I need to watch your stats.”

Korra pouted.  _ ‘I’m sorry for being a pain in the ass.’ _

Asami rolled her eyes. “You’re not a pain in the ass, Korra. If I didn’t want to sit and monitor someone’s oxygen levels and fluids I wouldn’t have become a doctor.”

Korra made a face that agreed and thought for a second.  _ ‘Did you ever play any sports in school?’  _

“I never really had the time,” Asami offered, “I’m also a little competitive and controlling so I don’t think team sports would have been for me anyway.”

_ ‘So studying has been your sport all your life?’ _ Korra smirked as she turned the laptop. 

Asami rolled her eyes again. “I said I never played team sports. I have my racing and I also happen to be proficient in several forms of martial arts.”

Korra’s eyes lit up and she typed furiously.  _ ‘You race??? WHAT KIND OF MARTIAL ARTS???’ _

Asami giggled at how animated the girl got. “Calm down, Avatar.” She smiled. “I don’t race professionally or anything, I don’t have the time, but I’ve been in self defense training all my life. It was a good way to lash out my energy and feelings.”

Korra tilted her head at the tone in Asami’s voice.  _ ‘Feelings?’ _

Asami was thinking of a way to reply, she wasn’t ready for that story yet, when her pager went off. “Saved by the bell,” she stood up and took a last look at the monitors, nodding that everything looked good. “I’m not sure how long I’ll be but if you need anything just hit the nurses button and someone will be here as soon as possible.”

Korra looked deflated but nodded and waved bye. 

“Watch something and get some rest, Korra.” She gave the girl a soft smile and left. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluff piece, I'm not sorry.
> 
> Also is isolation really so bad if Asami has to "monitor" her all the time?


	6. Chapter 6

Korra was smiling at her phone when Asami walked in and looked up to wave as she entered. 

“Good morning, how have you been feeling?”

Korra tilted her hand back and forth. “A bit better,” she wheezed out. Asami had been off the last two days and had told Opal to call her if anything happened but nothing did, which was a very good thing. Korra’s condition had gotten better and she was finally off the oxygen, but her voice was raspy and weak from disuse for a few days. 

“I’m glad to hear it. Anything exciting happen while I was gone?”

Korra shook her head. “I’ve been bored without someone in here, but Bolin has been sending me videos of Naga so that’s been entertaining.” She held out her phone to Asami and she watched the giant hound running amuck through the rain soaked streets. 

“Seems like she’s being well taken care of,” Asami said with a smile. She never had a pet herself, but with every picture and video Korra showed her of the giant white ball of fluff she found herself wanting one. 

“Yea I was really lucky to have Bo be able to take her in,” she said wistfully. She lamented often about how much she missed Naga. 

“Bolin is a good guy,” Asami offered sweetly as she fixed the settings on Korra’s IV.

“He really is,” Korra agreed. “Hey, this might sound weird, but is Opal seeing anyone?”

Asami’s spine turned to ice and her stomach dropped. “Oh, umm, she’s not seeing anyone but she is also straight. I’m sorry.”

“Wha-no!” Korra began wheezing out a laugh and had to hold her stomach, which finally got Asami to turn around. “Not for me! For Bolin.”

“Oh.”

Korra finally settled down and rested back onto the bed. “Yea, no. Opal is beautiful and all but,” she glanced away, “but yea not for me. Bolin hasn’t explicitly said anything to me but he’s also incredibly not subtle at all so I figured I would try and help him out.”

Asami knew she shouldn’t feel as light as she did at the admission but she pushed it aside. “Ok so are you and I going to be in cahoots? Setting our best friends up with each other?”

“I think it’s cute,” Korra said dreamily. “Do you think Bolin has a chance?”

“It’s worth a shot,” she shrugged. “Bolin is adorable.”

“Hey, leave him for Opal,” Korra said with a grin. “What about you? Are you seeing anyone?”

Asami blushed and coughed nervously. 

“Spirits, I’m sorry if that’s too personal, Asami,” Korra began. “I kind of forget sometimes that I’m your patient and that you have to sit here with me and you’re just so beautiful and of course you’re seeing someone and patients probably always hit on you and now I’m rambling...I’m sorry.”

“Wow.” Asami took a second to breathe, Korra just said she was beautiful. Not that no one has ever told her that, but having Korra say it was way better.  _ Your patient, Asami.  _

“I’m sorry, Asami.”

Asami chuckled. “Relax, Korra, it’s fine. For the record though I actually don’t get hit on by patients as often as you think.”

Korra looked at her as though she had three heads. “Really? But you’re...” she paused, not wanting to incriminate herself more. 

“Young.” Asami sighed. “I’m very young for what I do and most people either think I’m just a nurse or question my abilities because of my age. I can’t even tell you how many people have pushed me away from their kid thinking that I didn’t know what I was doing.”

“Well that’s just stupid,” Korra said protectively. “I, for one, think it’s really cool to have you as my doctor. I mean, you’re a genius! How could that be a bad thing?”

She smiled softly, feeling light again. “That means a lot, Korra, thank you.” Her pager blared for a  _ *911-room 217* _ and she stood up quickly. “I have to go, sorry.” And she ran out.

Korra calling her beautiful circled in her head for the rest of the day. 

//

“Why are you watching soccer highlights?”

“Spirits, Opal! Warn a girl you’re here first.”

“I knocked, you’re just so engrossed in...” she looked at the screen. “Oh my Raava, you’re watching  _ Korra’s _ highlights? Asami Sato you are smitten.”

“She’s a good player!” Asami cried. “I’ve always admired sports.”

She hopped onto the desk. “Cut the shit, Salami,” Opal said with a grin. “You don’t give two shits about soccer. You’re really into her, aren’t you?”

Asami pinched the bridge of her nose. “She’s my patient, Opal.”

“So?”

“So this isn’t Grey’s Anatomy. This is real life and we have consequences for that kind of thing.”

Opal scoffed. “Oh please, you own the majority of this hospital anyway and Varrick would never fire you, you’re a star!”

“Opal!” She looked around even though it was her office and the door was closed. “How many times do we have to go over that I don’t own anything.”

Opal looked uninterested. “You own the majority of shares in Future Industries, who happens to hold most of the shares of this hospital, ergo you own most of the hospital. Seriously you could sell half of those shares and live a happy and wealthy life of retirement. Yet here you are, working your ass off daily, and watching highlights on your patient who you’re crushing hard on who also happens to make a shit ton of money.”

“I can’t do it, Opal.”

“Why?”

“She’s my patient,” Asami said sternly. “It’s unethical. She has cancer and I need to treat her, not fall in love with her.”

“She won’t always have cancer, Asami.” Opal said softly. 

Asami shook her head. “I can’t. There are boundaries.”

Opal hopped off the desk and made to leave the office. “Well while you’re sitting here moping and pining behind your boundaries, I’m going to go get laid.”

“Already?” Asami asked in awe. “You guys have gone on one date!”

Opal turned. “I don’t like to live my life trying to satisfy societal norms and pressure. I get what I want, when I want it. And that is Bolin, in bed, with sheets scattered everywhere and-”

“Ok, that’s enough imagery!”

Opal softened. “Honestly though, Sams. You need a date or something. I know you love your work but there’s more to life than this.”

“I know,” Asami sighed and sank into her chair. Opal blew her a kiss and waltzed out of the room.

As much as she loved that woman, fucking hell was she a menace. 

She opened her laptop back up and clicked the next video. It was one thing to have Korra talk to her about the sport but watching her highlight plays? That was a completely different kind of enthrallment. Asami knew nothing about soccer but the way those tan thighs pumped as Korra soared across the field had her wondering why she had never taken the time to look before. 

//

Something crept up behind her as she stared at the soundless monitor. 

“Finally watching her stats from out here?” A voice whispered. 

“Fuck, Opal,” Asami yelped. “Stop scaring me like that.”

“Couldn’t help it,” Opal singsonged, “I could feel you pining from the OR.”

Asami swiveled in her chair. “How’d it go with Chang?”

“Good. We got all the tumor out and he’s starting to wake up. I know you’re not a huge fan of Amon, but he is a great surgeon. He can stop a bleeder faster than they start.”

Asami scoffed and turned back to the monitor. “Yea well he’s also a bigot, so there’s that. He’s only contracted until you finish residency anyway so I can manage.”

“How’s our girl?” Opal asked, finally looking down on the screens in the nurses station. “Probably asleep since you’re out here and not moping by her side.”

“Hush.” It was true, and no one who paid attention could deny that Asami spent an interesting amount of time monitoring her patient  _ inside _ her room and not at the nurses station, where everyone else does. She just passed it off as the fact that she didn’t have anyone else in isolation at the moment and it’s proper patient care. 

Which is a huge lie, but whatever. 

“Her BP was elevated for a while and then dropped but it’s on a steady incline again as well as her heart rate. Any higher and I’ll have to go in there. Her blood panels from today showed her pneumonia is pretty much gone but she’s been in a lot of pain.”

“The final stretch is always the worst,” Opal said sadly. Korra had spent the last three weeks in isolation and had another one to go. Round one of her chemo wouldn’t be done for almost another month, but the last few weeks were always so exhausting.

Korra’s heart rate spiked before Asami could reply and a monitor alerted them that she had pushed the button for a nurse. 

“Go, I have to go back to check on Chang.”

Asami nodded and they headed in separate directions quickly. She knocked on the door and walked in. Korra was writhing. 

“Hey! What’s wrong, Korra?”

She gasped and blue eyes opened wide. “Asami! It hurts, my stomach. Please-my mouth. It all-it all hurts.”

Asami quickly entered the amount of pain meds to administer into the machine and coaxed Korra onto her side. Usually her painful stomach led to vomiting, so she was prepared. 

Once that was over Korra laid back on the bed and pushed the button to raise it up to a sitting level. 

“Is the pain better?” Asami asked when she came back with a new pan. IV pain medication worked fast, thankfully. She hated seeing her patients in pain like that. 

“A little,” Korra nodded. “What are you doing here? It’s like, 2am.”

“I’m on call every other weekend,” Asami said as she fiddled with the machines. “You just haven’t needed anything in the middle of the night when I’m here.”

“You work a lot.”

“I like what I do,” Asami turned to face her and crossed her arms. Korra threw her a lopsided grin. Pain meds must be kicking in. 

“I like what you do too,” Korra said with a grin, but then her brows furrowed. “Well, like, not the fact that I have cancer and you have to deal with that, but I just like that you’re here with me. I don’t want another doctor. I want you.”

“Korra, I-“

“Hang on that sounded wrong,” Korra said with a pout and damn those meds. Asami gave her a little more than usual because of how much pain she had been in and to get her to sleep, which clearly had made Korra loopy. It was pretty cute. 

“No, not wrong?” Korra continued. “I do want you, but I’m your patient and that’s all. You probably don’t even like girls. You’re a good doctor, Asami.” She finished and gave Asami a dopey smile and her heart raced. 

“Korra you should get some sleep.”

Another pout. “My mouth still hurts, can you kiss it and make it better?” _Fuck_ , Korra was never getting that dose again when she was here. 

“Go to sleep, Korra,” Asami said finally. “Just push the button if you need something.”

Korra nodded and closed her eyes. Asami took in the picture for a moment, her fur lined hat somewhat askew, muscles shrinking by the day, dark skin had gotten so light that she really just wanted to take her outside, but they still had a week to go in isolation. 

She left the room and leaned against the wall to breathe. Korra had gotten to her, had crawled under her skin and somehow began residing next to that heart that ached for  _ something _ but was too afraid of what could be. 

She hated it. She hated the situation that they were in and she hated the fact that she had watched as this drop dead gorgeous woman had deteriorated before her eyes from the effects of cancer. She watched as skin lightened, weight and hair fell off, and though she was no stranger to it at all she couldn’t push it aside and be impartial like she usually could. Asami liked Korra, her patient, and she didn’t know what the fuck to do. 

Korra was just bright, and that would be the only way to describe her in an all-encompassing way. She had smiled through every poke of needle, every emptying of her stomach, every procedure. She laughed and joked constantly, usually winding up in pain from the exertion, but she continued on. It would be easy to succumb to the pains and aches, but Korra fought it every second of the day. She knew her limits, and it was only on really bad days that she needed pain meds. 

The thing is, Korra just had this energy about her that made Asami forget about the world, forget that they were in the belly of a hospital fighting for her life. Her energy was infectious, her stories were wild, her eyes and face were bright. Asami couldn’t care less about depleting muscles and a bald head, not when those eyes could whisk her off into the clouds with the way they conveyed emotion, no way. Korra was stunning, PICC line sticking out or not. Korra was bright. 

And that’s why Asami needed to get away. 

Not away, away. She would still be Korra’s doctor of course, but she needed to distance herself like she does with every other patient. She needed to be professional, ethical. She knew the pain of  _ what if _ , and she couldn’t do it again. 

She made it back to the nurses station and her trusty sidekick was sitting there with a bag of chips. 

“Opal, I need you to find me a date.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Asami.


	7. Chapter 7

Korra was infectious. 

Literally, the day before she was about to get out of isolation she wound up with another infection. Not as bad as the pneumonia, but she still had to be kept for another two weeks. 

But Korra was infectious and Asami was struggling hard to act right around her. She had weaseled so easily under Asami’s skin that it would take a lot to yank her out. So she’s going slow, or so she thought. 

“You’re on-call tonight?” Korra asked when Asami came into her room to switch out her fluids. “But it’s not the weekend?”

“You are correct,” she replied as she finished the change. Besides the infection, Korra’s pain had subsided and she was doing really well, just bored. Something must have flipped after that night where she was writhing in pain because she hadn’t needed any meds since. 

She had also woken up the next morning and seemingly forgotten everything she had said to Asami. She hadn’t known if that was a good or bad thing, but she was still determined to slowly wean herself off of those addictive blue eyes. 

“Do you want to sit for a minute?” Korra asked gently. “You look like you could use a minute to relax.”

She resisted the urge to say something sarcastic back. “I really shouldn’t, Korra. You need to rest.”

“Oh come on,” she replied with a smile. “I feel like I’ve hardly seen you lately and I doubt you have much to do at...” she looked at the clock on the wall, “11:17 at night. So what’s up, why are you here?”

Those damn bright eyes and bright smile and bright bald head. Asami sighed and sat down. It did feel good to finally rest. She looked at Korra and then suddenly everything was coming out. 

“My mom was diagnosed with cancer when I was six,” she began and Korra’s eyes softened. “She had B-cell type Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia.”

“Like me...”

Asami nodded. “She fought so hard but cancer treatment wasn’t as advanced back then as it is now. She died right after my eighth birthday, she tried so hard to make it a good birthday, and it was. I blamed myself for a long time that her working so hard for me is what killed her. Even though I know it’s not true, I still have a weird feeling about my birthday and I like to work to take my mind off of it.” 

“And here I am, bringing it up,” Korra muttered and scratched the back of her neck. 

Asami shook her head, it wasn’t her fault. “You didn’t know, Korra. It’s ok. You asked me once what my story was for why I wanted to become a doctor, and here it is. I watched her go through that and I swore to myself that I would help people, I would help them not have to be in that pain and to save everyone I could so that they didn’t have to leave their families.”

“You’re incredible,” Korra said in awe. “I feel like a lot of people would just let something like that eat them up inside but you didn’t.”

“My dad did, though.”  _ Why the fuck can’t she stop? _ “He-he was never the same after she died. He threw himself into work and I hardly ever saw him. He died my first year of med school from a heart attack. I say it was from a broken heart.”

Korra held out her hand and Asami hesitated before taking it in her own. So much for staying away, Korra was just getting nice and comfy in that spot next to her heart. 

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that, Asami,” she said softly, “but I am so thankful that they created you and that you’re here now. They must be so proud of you.”

Asami wiped a stray tear away. “Thank you.”

“Would you hate me if I said happy birthday? I’d make you a cake, but I’m kind of at a disadvantage here.” She gestured to her hospital gown and an empty room and Asami burst out laughing at how ridiculous this all was. 

“I’m good on the cake, but thank you.”

And it was just another tack into place in her heart, those blue eyes so tender. 

//

“You need to help me.”

“Good morning to you too, sunshine,” Opal said without looking up from her charts. 

“Please, Opal.” And it was her tone that made the other woman’s head snap up. 

“What happened?”

She looked around and absolutely no one was in the hall. “I need to get over Korra, it’s getting ridiculous. I told her about my parents the other day for fucks sake!”

Realization dawned on Opal. “So that’s what this is all about.”

“What?” Asami snapped. 

“You want to stop liking her because she might die? She’s not your mom, Asami.”

Asami opened her mouth but then closed it into a thin line. “That’s not what I asked, but thank you for the insight. I guess I’ll do it on my own.” She stormed off into her office and before Opal could even call out her name she slammed the door. 

//

Round two of treatment was a little better than its predecessor. The appointments were less frequent which meant that she could almost have a life again. 

Well, besides the fact that she needed to be careful all the time. 

The brothers had been amazing and cleaned her entire apartment the day before she was finally released from isolation and when Bolin brought over a very freshly groomed Naga, she bawled. 

Korra was excited to slowly start hanging out with her friends again. She had even gone so far as to buy a ton of hand sanitizer and face masks to keep herself protected. Isolation had really taken a toll on her, it was so lonely in there and the seemingly endless days sucked.

But they didn’t suck as bad as she has felt over the last few weeks that Asami had been giving her the cold shoulder. Ever since she started round two, which thankfully meant treatment only twice a week, she’d hardly seen her doctor besides a few cold checkups. Asami knocks, enters the room, checks her charts, asks how she’s feeling and if she needs anything, and then leaves. 

No talking, no joking, only generic smiles and frosty feelings. She couldn’t think of what had happened. Asami had opened up to her about her parents and even cried in front of her, and then that was it. That was a month ago, and now Asami was away again for a conference so that was another week of not seeing her. 

A knock on the door brought her out of her thoughts. 

“Hey Korra, how are you feeling this morning?”

“I’m ok, just the usual.”

Opal smiled and started to hook her up for the day. “That’s good. We’re starting you on radiation next week which will be a different kind of pain, but I know you can handle it.”

Korra hesitated, ignoring the talk of her treatment. “Opal, did I do something to piss off Asami?”

She turned to look at Korra with hesitant eyes. “I think we all did something to piss off Asami.” Opal sighed and sat down. “She has a hard time getting close to people, and it’s sort of her natural instinct to push people away when they get too close.”

“She told me about her parents,” Korra said. “Is that why?”

“That’s what I think,” Opal shrugged. “I basically had to force her to be my friend, she ever tell you about that?”

Korra shook her head and Opal laughed. “We met when I was here for treatment after my relapse in college, she was in her first year of clinicals. She was such a nerd but I instantly fell in love with her and I knew she would be my best friend forever, but she needed some convincing. She was forced to talk to me to do charting and I charmed her. Eventually I got thrown into isolation and she came to keep me company, stating I was a quiet place for her to study instead of the dorms.”

“So you’re saying I need to get thrown into isolation again?”

“No!” Opal gasped and Korra laughed. “Absolutely not and clearly that didn’t work for the 6 weeks you were in there,” she gave Korra a pointed look. “No, what I’m saying is you need to be patient with her, for as badass and heroic as she is, she’s dealt with a lot of heartbreak and thinks that holding people away will solve it. If anything, she’s pissed at just me.”

Korra quirked a brow, “what happened?”

“It’s not for me to say,” Opal said with a sad sigh. “I pushed her too far too quick, and she caved into herself. Now that we’re talking about it though, I should apologize to her.”

Opal left and Korra sat there thinking, and it didn’t take long to realize what it all meant. 

//

Asami was back on Monday but Korra had started radiation treatment and she felt too sick to say anything, so for two weeks she kept her mouth shut and lived with the distance that had grown between them. Asami wasn’t as stand-offish as she had been, but she was still distant. 

Korra was over it by the next week. 

“Do you think I’m going to die?” Her tone was clipped, annoyed. She felt like shit and wanted Asami back, the good Asami. 

Green eyes flashed over to hers. “What on earth would make you say that?” Asami finished hanging up the bag and stood in front of Korra. 

“We were close, don’t act like I’m stupid,” Korra snapped. “I know you never needed to stick around and we had fun. Then I go and tell you that I want you to kiss me when I’m drugged up and you tell me about your parents and now you run? Am I going to die, Asami? Is that why you’re acting like this?”

“You remembered that?” Asami asked quietly and blushed. 

Korra threw her hands into the air in annoyed embarrassment. “Yea of course I did, but you acted like nothing happened and I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable so I didn’t bring it up. Look, I get it you’re not interested and that’s fine, but I would have been fine just being friends too. You didn’t have to cut me off like that and just ignore me.”

“It’s not like that,” Asami tried. 

“Then what is it?” Korra asked incredulously. “If you don’t think I’m going to die then I don’t see what else it could be. Unless it’s...” she hesitated, “did I make you uncomfortable, and that’s why you don’t want to be friends? I swore to myself that I would keep my feelings locked up because I’m your patient and because I knew I wouldn’t have a chance.”

Asami looked confused. “Why would you think that you wouldn’t have a chance?” 

“Look at you!” She cried. “You’re beautiful and smart and amazing and even if you did like girls I wouldn’t have a chance.”

Asami sighed and sat down on the table in front of her. She took a couple moments of looking at the floor before raising her head to look at Korra. 

But before she could say anything her fucking pager went off.  _ *911-room 217* _

“Fucking damn it, Chang. Korra I’m so sorry, but it’s an emergency.”

Korra sat back in her chair and looked away. “Yea, I understand.”

Asami was reluctantly out the door before she saw Korra shed a tear. 

Korra laid back and thought again. If it wasn’t because Asami thought she was going to die and it wasn’t because she didn’t want to be friends then what was it? She thought and thought about every one of their interactions she could remember and it started to make her head hurt. 

She thought of those bright green eyes and her easy smile. She thought of how Asami would sit with her when she needed a break and how beautiful her laugh was with Korra’s stupid jokes. She thought of how much concern those eyes held the moment something seemed wrong. 

Then about how she brought Korra her personal laptop so they could talk, and how Asami would sit with her for hours during her stay in isolation. How she looked confused at Korra thinking she didn’t have a chance. How Asami was always there. 

That’s when she realized it. Korra  _ did _ have a chance, Asami was interested in her, but that was also the problem. Like Opal said, she pushes away people when they’re too close, and this is a risk she isn’t willing to take. She can’t be with someone who  _ might _ die, who will have to live their life worrying that the cancer will come back and finish the job. 

Korra slumped down even further in her chair and groaned. She was such an idiot! She just yelled at someone who was so afraid to let people in and get hurt and now here she is hurting Asami’s feelings for no good reason. 

And then she was pissed at the cancer for wrecking her body and making it so that her amazing doctor wouldn’t, no, couldn’t be with her. Cancer may have brought Korra here to Asami, but it was also the reason they couldn’t be together. Korra was her patient, it would be unprofessional and unethical, and that’s what Asami had always meant. 

Fuck cancer and fuck stupid rules. 

//

Her phone blared and she dropped her fork in a panic, the noise causing several heads to turn.

“I am so sorry, Iroh, but I have to take this.”

She got up without waiting for his reply and ducked into the hall to answer. 

“Opal what’s wrong.”

_ ‘It’s Korra, she’s back in here with a fever and her BP is tanking.’ _

“It’s not her chest or stomach this time?”

_ ‘No I think it’s sepsis, her PICC line looks a little red.’ _

“Ok start her on meropenem, norepinephrine, and fludrocortisone. I’ll be in soon.”

_ ‘Ok I’m on it.’ _

“Oh and Opal, be ready in case she codes.”

Asami hung up the phone and rushed back to their table. “Iroh I have to go, I’m sorry.”

Iroh was a gentleman, but he looked annoyed. This was the second date she’s run out on. “Asami this isn’t going to work if you always have to leave.”

“And if you think a date is more important than saving a life then this was never going to work in the first place. Bye, Iroh.”

She stormed off, not giving two shits about what people thought and the second she got outside she was both thankful for driving separately and annoyed at having worn a dress. So now she had to sit through traffic instead of being able to cut lanes on her motorcycle. 

The hospital wasn’t far from Kwong’s which had been in her favor, but she still was on a time crunch. She ran through the hospital, heels clacking loudly on the tile floors and she received numerous looks on her attire. Honestly, had no one seen a woman in a dress before?

She ran towards isolation and the room number Opal texted her. Throwing her useless purse into the nurses station as she passed, Asami burst a little too aggressively into the room. 

Everyone’s head turned towards her but she only had eyes for Korra, who took one look at Asami before her eyes rolled into the back of her head. 

And then she flatlined. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Korra. Why are you both so blind?
> 
> meropenem - antibiotic used to stop the growth of bacterial infections
> 
> norepinephrine - used to stimulate blood pressure in septic patients
> 
> fludrocortisone - steroid to reduce inflamation


	8. Chapter 8

“Drop the bed!” Asami barked as she ran to the bedside to begin compressions, decontamination be damned. 

But the second she got there Korra slammed open her eyes, turned, and vomited all down Asami’s dress.

“I’m so sorry,” she croaked and wiped her mouth. 

“It’s fine,” Asami cooed, vomit was arguably better than CPR. She moved Korra’s shirt out of the way to look at the port; it was definitely infected. “Zhu Li, call OR and tell them we’re bringing up a PICC clean. You two,” she pointed at the other nurses, “take her up there and get her prepped. Opal, get me some scrubs.”

“I’m sorry, Asami.” Korra said again with watery eyes. 

“How many times do I have to tell you not to be sorry?” 

Korra smiled. “Every time.”

Everyone rushed off and she was left in the room soaked in vomit. She unzipped her dress and stepped out, careful not to slip on any particles that had hit the floor, and then removed her heels to wait for clean scrubs. 

“If I were any gayer my heart would have stopped when I saw you too,” Opal said with a smirk and handed over the scrubs and some wet towels to wipe down her body. 

“Opal you’re not even gay.”

“And you know how much I hate that fact,” she replied somberly. “Come on let’s go clean out an infected line.”

“Just what I wanted to do on a Friday night.”

//

Korra woke up to an aching body and a dry throat. They had barely transferred her onto the OR bed before she was knocked out. It was the first procedure she’s had so far where they actually put her to sleep and it had been wonderful waking up in recovery with zero pain from the surgery drugs. 

That was a few hours ago though and now she was alone in what looked to be isolation, again, and she was thirsty. She pushed the nurse button and waited, thinking wistfully about the clothes they had to cut off once more. 

To her luck, it was Asami that answered the call. 

“Everything alright, Korra?”

Korra nodded. “I’m just thirsty.”

Asami looked at her IV rack. “Ok I’ll go get you some water and a new saline drip. I’ll be right back.”

When she returned she gave Korra the water and told her to go slow, then hung up a new bag of fluids and sat down. 

“You had a blood infection from your PICC line,” Asami began. “I’m really happy that you came in as soon as you did because we got it cleaned up mostly before it could get really bad. You will be in here again for a little bit, but sepsis advances quickly so you caught it right in time.”

“I learned my lesson of listening to my body last time,” Korra said with a grin. 

“That’s what I like to hear.”

They sat in companionable silence for a little while Korra finished her water. 

“I’m sorry about your dress, it was really pretty.”

Asami laughed brightly. “Don’t worry about it, I was probably going to burn it anyway.”

“I always knew you were a pyro,” Korra joked. “Date went bad?”

“Something like that,” Asami said easily. “He didn’t like that I would rather save a life than sit at a stuffy dinner with him, so it was doomed from the start.”

“Well, he’s an idiot.”

Asami hummed. “I’m practically married to this job, so relationships are sometimes hard. It’s why my ex left me after a few years together.”

“Well he was an idiot too,” Korra grunted. 

“ _ She _ was a psycho and it was a blessing in disguise.”

If Asami was looking for a surprised look Korra didn’t give it to her. 

She just looked into those green eyes and gave a soft smile. “I already figured that out, you know?” Korra said plainly. “I know that you’re into me and that’s why you tried to push me away.”

“Korra-“

“Just let me finish,” she cut her off gently. “It’s not that you think I’m going to die, it’s just that it’s possible. If not this time around then it’s likely I’ll relapse and it can happen then. You’re afraid of giving in just to have what happened to your parents again, especially since I have the same cancer as your mom did. I understand it now, Asami. I do, and I’m not upset. I’m sorry that I yelled at you.”

She watched as that beautiful face turned to anguish at her words, it was clear how much it hurt them both. Asami held back a sob, “Korra I’m so sorry, I am so, so sorry.”

“Don’t be,” she held out her hand which Asami took quickly. “It sucks, but I get it. Can we at least try and be friends though? I can’t do the cold shoulder thing anymore. I want you to be able to come to me if you’re tired and need a break or some stupid jokes to laugh to and as cool as Zhu Li is, she’s just not you.”

Asami let out a watery laugh and nodded her head. “Yea, I think I’d like that.”

Korra gave her a wide, dry-lipped smile. “Cool. Oh and I’m totally going to flirt with you the whole time to try and change your mind, by the way.”

“Of course you are.”

//

“Opal, what’s up?”

_ ‘Korra has been getting headaches and says she’s dizzy.’ _

Asami stepped to the side out of people’s way. “Shit, ok. Check her levels and get a CT of her chest and stomach and I’ll do a spinal tap when I’m back tomorrow. For now just give her ibuprofen and dimenhydrinate.”

_ ‘On it, boss. I’ll keep you posted.’ _

“Thanks, Opal.”

Korra had been the textbook example of a perfect patient these last three months. Unlike round one which was littered with issues, besides the infection in the very beginning of round two, Korra had been perfect. Her levels were steady, she learned how to manage her nausea and pain properly, things had been good. But of course, nothing is perfect in the world of cancer. 

Korra had been so cute though. Since the chemo switched in round two her hair had started to grow back and while it had been straight before it was growing back really wavy, and she was having fun with it. One time she had spiked it and imitated Mako so perfectly that her, Asami, and Opal were in tears laughing. It was good to see her start to look more like herself, not that any of her brightness had ever faded.

Korra also happened to be a hopeless flirt. Since both of their feelings were now in the open she wasn’t afraid to tell Asami exactly what she felt. Sometimes Asami had to tell her to be quiet because of certain people in the room, but it generally was harmless and sweet. It made her heart flutter every time and she often wished she would wear a mask to hide her blush. 

She was still sticking to her guns that she couldn’t pursue a relationship with Korra, but the weird friendship/patient/pining lover bit they had going on was fun. 

Asami made her way back into the crowd of people at the airport and was ready to head home. Conferences were a nice time to travel and interact with doctors from around the world, but lately she’s been wanting to go on them less and less. She tried to tell herself it wasn’t because of Korra, but of course that was a lie. 

//

There was always a fresh bout of nerves that settled in her stomach when a patient began exhibiting new symptoms that could be an indication that the cancer was spreading. If Korra was getting headaches and dizzy spells it could mean that her leukemia had traveled to her spine or brain, which could really put a damper on their recent good luck streak. Her nerves wouldn't settle until they got their answer, so for now she just had to be the most confident doctor she could be, even in the face of possible trouble.

Confidence was never her issue, but the nerves seemed more dense when any of it had to do with Korra.

Asami slapped her gloves into place. “So we’re going to give you some sedative to keep you relaxed for this and once you lie on your side I want you to curl into a ball and hug your knees, ok?”

“Sounds good, Doc.” She turned around to slide onto the bed and curled into the ball. 

“You’re going to feel a few pinches while I numb you up but this should be painless.”

Korra nodded and chatted with Opal while Asami cleaned her back and numbed her up. 

“Ok hold still now,” Asami said and grabbed the syringe. 

“I can feel you staring at my butt, Asami,” Korra cooed innocently. 

She pulled her hands back away from her patient. “Korra not now, damn it,” Asami huffed and looked at Opal who was trying not to laugh. “I’m about to stick a needle into your spine.”

“Fine, be that way,” Korra replied petulantly. “I wore these penguin boxers just for you though.”

And of course Asami had to glance. The penguins  _ were _ cute as fuck. 

“I got her, didn’t I?” Korra asked Opal who winked. 

“Opal, get out.”

“But-“

“Out.”

Asami waited for the door to shut before continuing. “Hold still, this won’t take long.” She drew the spinal fluid quickly and covered up the spot with a gauze pad and tape. “Ok, slowly let go of your knees and lay down on your back.”

Korra did as she was told with a little help from Asami. She looked up cautiously. “Was that too much?”

Asami shook her head. “Just bad timing. I could have seriously injured you, Korra.”

“I’m sorry, I just missed you this week and thought it would be fun.”

“Thank you for the apology,” Asami said softly, heart beating faster than it should at the knowledge of Korra missing her. “Also you’re getting better at only doing it around Opal.”

Opal wasn’t thrilled with the idea of them two having feelings for each other and not doing anything, but Asami shut her down every time she tried to talk about it. So now her best friend was in cahoots with Korra every chance she could get. 

“I’ll try and be better,” Korra said with a nod and Asami patted her hand. 

“I have to go run this to the labs but you need to stay here for an hour. I’ll be back, ok?”

Korra nodded again. 

Asami paused at the door. “Oh and for the record, the penguins were very cute.” And she left the room, smiling as she heard Korra laugh. 

//

“I’ve got good news and bad news, Korra.”

“As is tradition,” Korra said with a smile. “Lay it on me.”

“Good news is that your cancer hasn’t spread to your spine,” Asami started, “but the bad news is we need to do a bone marrow transplant.”

“Wasn’t that already in the plan?” 

“Yes and no, you could say,” she offered. “It’s not always necessary and sometimes we can escape it, but your levels just aren’t improving. The bad news is that it might be hard to find a match.”

Korra nodded. They had discussed a few times about the likelihood of getting a match on the donor list, that it was much more common to match with a family member. It just so happened that Korra had hardly any living family and not a lot of Water Tribe people were on the donor list. It wasn’t necessarily required to be of the same ethnicity to match, but it was far more likely. 

“My parents are ready,” Korra said, “and my team all want to get tested as well as the brothers.”

“Ok we will get them all in here as soon as possible and I’ll send the orders down to the Water Tribe for your parents.” 

That was one of the best things about working in oncology was the fact that even though it was a horrible disease, it really brought people together. It seemed to be a lesson to families about staying close to one another because you never know when the end will be. 

Korra tilted her head and smiled. “Asami, will you teach me how to play Pai Sho?”

//

Asami looked at the lab reports again and sat back with a sigh. Out of Korra’s parents, the brothers, Tenzin’s family, and the entire Rebels team, only one girl had been a semi-good match for Korra’s bone marrow transplant. Semi-good wasn’t good enough for Korra, not in Asami’s book. She pinched the bridge of her nose and thought about all of her life choices for a while. 

A soft knock sounded on her door. “Hey, Boss. Any news?”

“Nothing,” Asami groaned and Opal came to sit in front of her and read the labs. “Over three weeks and probably 50 people and none of them are good enough.”

“Donor list still not delivering?”

“Nope,” Asami said. “She’s been on the list of recipients since we started treatment and there’s nothing.”

Opal gave her a knowing look. “We’ve done all we can, Asami. Her levels are steady and it hasn’t traveled, so now we will just have to wait and hope someone comes up.”

Asami thought about those words for a moment before sitting up. “Opal, let’s test me.”

“What?” She replied with a shocked face. 

“It’s a long shot but what do I have to lose?”  _ I can’t lose Korra. _

“Ok...I’ll go grab some tubes then.”

//

“No, you see, the white lotus tile should...”

A knock on the door stopped her lesson. “Dr. Sato? Sorry, I was told to rush these to you.”

Asami got up from her chair and took the papers from the lab tech. “Thank you.”

She was frozen, she couldn’t believe her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Korra asked, noticing her shocked posture. 

Asami looked at her. “You have a match.”

Korra dropped the tile in her hand and it clattered over the board. “Wait, seriously? Who?”

“It’s, uh, anonymous,” Asami lied. “The donor bank doesn’t share their name just the levels you match on.”

Korra sat back and sighed happily. “That’s amazing. So when do I get it?”

“I need to go talk to Opal,” Asami said distractedly. “I’m assuming soon, but it’ll be easy for you, it’s done through your PICC line.”

She left the room with hardly a goodbye and hurried through the halls, paging Opal to meet her in her office as soon as possible. They arrived at her door at the same time.

“In,” she beckoned and closed the door behind them. She handed Opal the papers and watched her face change in realization. 

“No fucking way,” she whispered. “No way!”

“Yes!” Asami cried. “I feel like I’m going to pass out at the odds. I can’t believe we’re a match.”

Opal grabbed her shoulder and shook it violently in excitement. “This is like, crazy unrealistic romance novel type shit, Asami. I mean come on. This is so cute.”

Asami rolled her eyes. “We need to book an OR, you’re going to collect my marrow.”

“Me?” Opal looked stunned. “But I’m-“

“A third year resident now who has been nearly perfect in all her marks,” Asami said proudly. “You are more than qualified. And I really don’t want Amon staring at my ass.”

“You sure about this?” Opal asked skeptically, giving her a last out. 

Asami nodded. “I wouldn’t have said it if I wasn’t ready.”

“Ok, let’s do this!”

She sat in her office later that night, just reading and rereading the results. How on earth could they have gotten so lucky in this way? It wasn't a perfect match, they hardly ever are, but it was enough for Asami to be confident in the ability for the transplant to stick. It was scary, of course, to think of how quickly she had been ready to give up her own body in a sense to try and save Korra. Her patient. She would have done it for any patient, wouldn't she?

And of course the answer to that is no, or maybe just that the thought of seeing if she was a match had ever crossed her mind until now. Just because she couldn't allow herself the taste of something _more_ with Korra didn't meant that she couldn't go above and beyond, that she couldn't do something for her that she would have so quickly done if she wasn't a doctor. If it meant saving her life, she would do anything, she was sure of it. 

Keeping it a secret from Korra that she was the match? Well, Asami had some suspicions that Korra would never allow her to go through any sort of pain for her own sake and would refuse the transplant. It was wrong, in a sense, but donors do have the option to remain anonymous so it wasn't as though she was doing anything illegal, just a little secretive. She couldn't feel bad about it though, not if it worked, and how would Korra ever find out anyway?

Now all Asami could do was hope that it would all go according to plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dimenhydrinate - dramamine, or an anti nausea medicine used to treat dizziness.
> 
> Also I forgot to mention that Korra fainted from a heady mixture of her infection and seeing Asami in that devastatingly beautiful dress, but of course it was more of the latter. Such a disaster bisexual, Korra, but same.


	9. Chapter 9

Asami’s surgery to remove her bone marrow was scheduled for that night but she had to go over all of the risks about the transplant with Korra again because she wasn’t going to see her for a day or so after her own procedure. Asami would have to be in recovery for a little bit, but also it took about a day to get the transplant set up and functional. 

She was just worried that the limitations were going to really put Korra in a sour mood. 

“Hey,” Asami said as she entered Korra’s room, “everything is all set, you’ll start getting the transplant the day after tomorrow, but I want to talk to you about what’s going to happen during and after, ok?”

“You know,” Korra said with that damn lopsided grin, “you’re really cute when you use your doctor voice.”

“Korra this is my normal voice.”

Korra waved her off. “No, like when you get that authoritative tone like you mean business. It’s hot.”

“You know,” Asami said and crossed her arms, “chemo is supposed to reduce sexual desire.”

“You’re just so beautiful that my body won’t allow my desire to go away.” Korra looked proud at how suave that was. 

“So back to your cancer,” Asami rerouted the conversation for the sake of her red cheeks. “Korra, bone marrow transplants are dangerous, there’s no other way to put it. Now that we’re in round three you were supposed to have a reprieve from chemo but this will almost be worse than round one. This is going to strip you of pretty much any remaining immune system so the new bone marrow can build it back up.”

“So I’m going to be stuck in isolation?” Korra asked defeatedly. 

“For a week or so, yes,” Asami replied softly. “We’ll have to monitor you closely in case your body rejects the new marrow, but after that you’re going to have to basically quarantine yourself for a few months.”

She could tell that Korra was trying to keep her spirits up but hearing that she was going to have to lock herself away again was one of the last things she could have wanted. 

“So what are my rules?” She asked. 

Asami sighed. “Minimal contact with people, as in like pick a certain one or two people who you trust to wash themselves properly before coming over and I would recommend face masks while visiting. You can stay home, you don’t have to be stuck here, but...” she paused, “Korra you can’t have Naga near you for a few months.”

“What!?” Korra’s eyes went wide. 

“Dogs just are too prone to carrying things that could infect you,” Asami offered gently. She knows how much Korra loves her dog. “To an average person it’s usually nothing but she could step on something outside and bring it in. I’m so sorry, Korra.”

“Ok,” Korra sat back and nodded. “Ok. It’s ok, Asami. I’ll just have Bolin keep her and I’ll figure it out.” She scrunched her fists and closed her eyes for a second. “Fuck this sucks.”

“I know it’s going to be hard, but it’s your best option. You have to fight through this.”

“I will,” Korra said matter of factly. “I promise.”

//

At least she could tell people how sore they will be after getting a bone marrow biopsy. It had been a little over a day and she was pretty damn sore, but she tried to walk as normally as possible to fend off any questions from Korra as she walked into her room to hook up the transplant.

“Morning, Korra! You ready?”

Korra gleamed. “For you? I’m always ready.”

Asami laughed and shook her head, walking over gently to the IV rack and got Korra set up.

Korra squinted her eyes at her. “Why are you limping?” 

Busted. 

She really was trying to play it off as best as she could, but Korra was observant. 

She waved her hand in the air like it was nothing. “Oh, I just fell on my morning jog yesterday. I’m fine, just sore.”

Korra kept squinting at her and Asami just smiled. Show no fear. 

“Well, I have to run,” Asami said brightly, “Opal should be by in a little to check on you and then I’ll be back later to give you your discharge instructions.”

“Ok, I’ll see you later then,” Korra offered easily. “Maybe ice that hip so it stops bothering you.”

“Will do, Doc,” Asami said with a wink and walked out. 

//

“Opal, why is Asami limping?”

Opal snapped her head towards Korra. “Oh, I think she fell or something?”

Korra tried to stare daggers at the doctor but Opal had four brothers and no fear, especially of a withering cancer patient. In the end it was Korra who was scared. 

“Oh whatever,” Korra relented. “How’s my dog? How’s Bolin?”

Opal laughed and sat down. “They’re both fine, Korra. You know Bolin loves Naga and she’s in a good home.”

“I know, I just miss her,” Korra said with a sigh. “Can I ask you something kind of personal?”

“Of course.”

“How do you do it?” Korra began. “You know, like how do you live after this and not be afraid all the time.”

Opal hummed in thought. “It’s kind of cliche but when you’ve been on the brink of death and survive you realize that life is a gift. But it’s a gift that can be squished into a ball and thrown in the fire so you kind of just enjoy it day by day and accept the fact that shit happens.”

She took a moment to see it Opal’s way and then smiled. “That’s actually a really good point,” 

She smiled and winked. “I’m pretty good at that.”

Opal headed out and Korra sat back, letting her mind wander through everything she had been worried about over the months since her diagnosis. She had always tried to keep a smile on her face and her head held high, but thoughts of  _ what if _ always creeped into the back of her mind. 

What if she died? Her parents would be alone in the world. Where would Naga go? Would Mako and Bolin be ok? She had even written letters to everyone she loved at one point after one of her stays in isolation. It was just a precaution, but she wanted to let everyone know how much they meant to her if something were to happen. 

But every day she saw those bright green eyes she never worried. She never worried about what could be because the now was too good. Asami’s bright smile and tinkling laugh always pushed away the thought of her issues, it pushed away her aches and pains. 

Asami was a gift, a light, a breath of fresh air when her lungs were filled with fluid. She was fun and spunky and tried so hard to be reserved but whenever she let herself slip around Korra it was so damn cute to watch a blush grow on her cheeks. 

If she made it through this, she was going to work her ass off to prove it to Asami that it would be worth it. That she could be worth it.

And speaking of ass, Korra didn’t believe for one second that Asami fell and hurt her hip. 

“Korra?” Asami said with a knock.  _ Convenient. _ “Hey, I finished early so I wanted to check in on you.” 

Damn that smile. 

Asami walked past her to check all of her fluids and Korra poked the spot where she knew they drew bone marrow from. Asami yelped. 

“What the hell was that for?” She demanded. 

“For lying to me,” Korra said simply. 

Asami turned back to the monitors. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Korra wasn’t in the mood to play games so she just stared at Asami until she turned around and then kept staring until one of them broke. 

Asami sat down gingerly on the table in front of Korra and sighed. “How did you know?”

“It’s pretty easy to notice a change in gait of someone you’re always watching,” Korra offered and then flinched. “Ok that sounded creepy, I just meant I look at your ass a lot.”

“And that’s less creepy?” Asami raised a brow and smirked. 

“It would be creepy if I wasn’t so charming.”

Asami laughed and looked Korra over before sighing. “I’m sorry for lying, I was just afraid you wouldn’t let me do it if you knew. I understand if you’re mad and uncomfortable, but it was the only way.”

“You think I’m mad?” Korra asked incredulously. “Asami you’ve saved my life on numerous occasions and you literally gave a piece of yourself to save me! I’m not mad, I’m just...” she waved her hand in the air trying to find the words. “I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to repay you.”

“You don’t have to repay anything, Korra,” Asami said softly. “Literally you pay nothing, your medical costs are covered by the state.”

Korra rolled her eyes. “You know what I meant. I just don’t know why you would do this for me.”

“Let’s just consider it top-notch patient care,” Asami said with a smile and they both laughed. 

Korra searched her face and didn’t find an ounce of regret, clearly Asami had thought everything through and had chosen to do this. It was above and beyond her call of duty as a doctor. Those beautiful green eyes stared right back at her and they both got lost in each other for a moment. 

“You’re so beautiful, Asami.” Korra couldn’t help herself. Asami was physically beautiful but her soul and spirit was even more so and Korra was in awe. She couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that Asami would go through pain like that just for her. Of course Korra knew that she would do the same for Asami in a heartbeat, but still. “I wish we could be together.”

“Oh, Korra-“ Asami immediately deflated. 

Korra balled her fists together in anguish. “I’m sorry, I know why and everything, I just hate it. You’re so amazing and you’re such a wonderful person. I just wish-I wish I could make you happy. I would really try, you know?”

“I know you would,” Asami replied with a choked voice. 

Korra had to look away and Asami got the point to leave her alone for now.

//

Korra stopped flirting that day. It had been fun to tease and watch Asami blush each time but she had grown to truly care for the doctor and her infatuation in the beginning turned into adoration and longing. The longing is what hurt, and knowing that Asami was in the same boat hurt even more. She couldn’t flirt because she knew that it would never be and she had to stop. 

She had never wanted someone so bad. Korra wanted to give Asami the world, wanted to support her passions and love her unconditionally, even if she worked herself to the bone. It was hard because she saw the love and passion in those green eyes for what she does and it lights Korra’s spine on fire in disastrous longing looking into them. 

A few months slid by achingly slow and her hatred for this stupid situation seeped into her head every day, it was almost becoming unbearable. The universe seemed to have it out for her for some reason and every time she tried to distance herself from that beautiful doctor something would happen that threw them back together. 

Such as right now, as she sits here at her 3 month post transplant checkup and Bolin called her to tell her that he’s moving away for a few months to be on location for his new mover. Korra wanted to pull her new hair out at the stress of finding someone to take Naga when Asami knocked on the door. 

“Korra?” She said softly as she entered the room, smile dropping instantly when she saw her hunched over. “Are you ok? What’s wrong?”

Korra wanted to yell, scream, cry. It was all getting to be too much. “Bolin is moving away for a few months,” she gritted through her teeth, trying to stay calm. “I have to figure out where Naga can go because Mako practically lives at the precinct and he’s not a pet person.”

Asami paused. “I can take her.”

“What?” Korra’s head snapped up and she had to shake the hair out of her face. She had gotten used to being bald and now her wavy little bob was a nuisance. 

“I’ve never had a pet, but always wanted one,” Asami said with a shrug. “It could be like a trial period for me.”

“No offense, Asami,” Korra began, “but you kind of live at the hospital too and Naga is a needy bitch. I love her, but she’s a lot of work.”

Asami raised an eyebrow in challenge. “Well I live in a house with a yard so she can run out her energy, and if Bolin is leaving that frees up Opal’s time and she can help me.”

Korra shook her head. “Asami you’ve already done so much for me, I couldn’t ask this of you.”

She hummed in a bored fashion. “Well you’re not asking, I’m offering,” Asami replied. “What else would you do, send her home to your parents? No.” She smiled wide, “and this way I can send you cute pictures of her all the time.”

And that’s how she got Asami Sato’s cell phone number. 

The universe was really out to get her. 

//

Asami woke up to her phone buzzing and her heart skipped a beat when she saw who was calling. 

“Korra, what’s wrong?”

_ ‘I have a fever, I’m heading to the hospital. I figured you would want to know first.’ _

“Korra are you driving yourself?”

A soft, tired laugh sounded through the phone.  _ ‘Asami it’s 3am, no one is on the road. It’s fine.’ _

“Still...I’ll be there in 10 minutes, just go straight up to oncology. Opal is on-call tonight.”

_ ‘Got it, Doc.’ _

“I’ll see you soon and drive safe, Korra.”

Korra mumbled something and hung up. Asami jumped out of bed, whispering an apology to the sleeping pile of fur that was balled at her feet. She threw on a sweatshirt and shoes and was out the door. She was going to have to shower and decontaminate herself when she got to the hospital anyway so her clothes didn’t matter. She called Opal on her way and gave her instructions on what to start before she got there. 

Korra had been incredibly lucky in a sense when it came to her cancer. It didn’t spread like ALL usually does and she had bore the treatment well with rather minimal side effects. She seemed, however, decently prone to infections and it made the hair on the back of Asami’s neck stand up. Many people don’t realize just how bad a simple infection could get for a cancer patient with no immune system. A paper cut to a healthy person is an annoyance, a paper cut to a person on chemo could be deadly. That’s being a little dramatic, but still. 

Korra was lively and energetic. Before all of this she would be the type of person to fall and get all scraped up only to just rub off the gravel and keep running. It wasn’t that Korra was dirty by any means, it is just very hard to take someone’s whole demeanor and change it to be cautious. If there was one thing that Korra had never really been in her life it would be cautious. 

She showered and scrubbed hard, getting every bit of dog off of her that she could, then slipped into her fresh scrubs and headed for the isolation room that should really just have Korra’s name on it by now. 

“14 minutes,” Korra tutted when Asami finally entered the room. “You’re getting slow there, Doc.”

“I’d like to see you get ready as quick as I did, Avatar,” Asami bantered. “Plus I had to scrub extra, your dog is a cuddler.”

Korra grinned. “She learned it from the best.”

Asami blushed slightly and took the charts from Opal. It had been a few months since Korra had flirted with her and she could easily figure out why, as she had felt that pain too, but it was nice to see her playfulness back. 

“Ok so what’s been going on?” Asami asked, getting back to being a doctor. 

“I’ve been a little extra nauseous the last day or so and my stomach really started hurting in the middle of the night so I took my temperature and then headed here.”

“Nothing else?” Asami questioned. “It isn’t your chest or head?”

Korra shook her head. “No, but my stomach hurts really bad right here,” she gestured to the bottom right side. “It’s never hurt there before.”

Asami and Opal looked at each other. 

“Opal, go call radiology and get them up here,” she started and grabbed a pair of gloves. “Korra I’m going to feel around your stomach and tell me when it hurts, ok?”

Korra nodded and laid back onto her bed as Asami lowered it down so she was laying more prone. She lifted her shirt away and started to gently palpate Korra’s stomach on the opposite side of the pain. She reached the spot that had been causing pain and Korra grimaced when Asami pushed on it but yelped when the pressure was released. 

“I think you have appendicitis,” Asami said with a sigh. 

Korra dropped her head to the bed. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

Asami shook her head. “This isn’t even cancer related. Sometimes bodies just decide to not want their appendix anymore.”

“So, surgery?” Korra said defeatedly. 

“We have to get an X-ray to make sure, but yes.” Asami paused. “Would you be comfortable with Tenzin being your surgeon? I can’t do it because I’m oncology, not general.”

Korra furrowed her brows. “Tenzin isn’t a surgeon anymore though?”

“He still has surgical privileges at this hospital, and he’s the only person I would trust.” She paused and fidgeted. “He’s also the only person who would let me in there with him.”

“Ok, I trust the both of you,” Korra said and pushed the button to raise her bed back up. “Asami?” She paused. “Can you-can you just sit with me for a bit? I don’t feel like talking or anything, but I just really don’t want to be alone right now.”

Asami brought the lone chair close to Korra’s bed and sat down, leaning against the stark white sheets but not touching her patient. “Of course I can.”

//

Asami didn’t want to push it, but Korra was starting to scare her. Her surgery went beautifully and everything was fine, but Korra had to be in isolation for her recovery. With her risk of infection being so high and having three cuts in her stomach from the laparoscopy it was too dangerous to let her be in regular recovery or discharge her to go home. 

Her surgery was 10 days ago. 

The first few days of recovery were regular, she was uncomfortable and didn’t feel good but she was Korra, but the last few days had not been so easy. Every time Asami had come to check on her, Korra’s eyes were glued to the ceiling and she would only give one word replies, if that. 

Korra was finally succumbing to the horrible woes of isolation. 

Humans are naturally and primally social beings, they crave communication and experiences with others and especially for someone like Korra who is quite extroverted, isolation was her own personal brand of torture. Asami wasn’t surprised at all when she finally snapped. 

“Good morning, Korra,” Asami said as she entered the room for her morning checkup. “How are you feeling today?”

“Do you have to keep asking that?” Korra asked dryly. “Seriously isn’t there a better way than the same five fucking words every time?”

Asami didn’t say anything but both of her brows raised in mild shock as Korra continued. 

“I feel like shit, is that what you want to hear? I feel like shit and I fucking hate this. I hate this stupid cancer and I hate being here all the time and I want my life back. I want to go outside and workout and not sit around and have my hot doctor who won’t date me because I’m a death risk cleaning out my vomit pans everyday!” Her hands balled the sheets of her bed in rage. “I miss my life, I miss my team and my friends, I miss my fucking dog. My parents are here and I can’t even see them. I haven’t gotten a hug from my mom in months, months! Do you even know what that’s-“

She finally stopped and looked horrified but Asami stopped her first. 

“Don’t say sorry, Korra, for the love of Raava,” she gave. “My parents died a long time ago, it’s ok. Honestly I want you to let this all out, you’ve held it in for far too long.”

“I just don’t get it,” Korra continued after a beat. “Why me? I know it sounds selfish and everyone with cancer must ask it but, why me? All I want is to work out and cuddle my dog and take you on a date and give you everything you want and deserve, so why me?” Hands let go of the sheets and sat helplessly in her lap. “Why couldn’t we just have bumped into each other on a morning jog and fell in love that way? Why...why did I have to meet you like this? It’s fucking ripping me apart on the inside, this pain of knowing we want each other but can’t be is worse than any fucking chemo side effect. Trying to distance myself from you has been worse than two months in isolation. All I want to do is kiss you and I can’t, so why? Why me?”

“I wish I had the answers for you, Korra, I really do.” Asami’s voice was tight at Korra’s impassioned hurt. 

Korra shook her head. “I’m done, I’m just so done and over this. I want it to be over already. I thought I was strong enough, but I don’t know if I am.”

Asami was appalled. “You can’t say that!” She cried. “You’re stronger than anyone I’ve ever met, Korra. I’ve never seen anyone smile through all their pain like you have. You have to keep going, you promised.”

Blue eyes found hers and held them close. “What’s in it for me?”

Asami wanted to scream. “You have a whole life waiting for you, Korra! All of those people you said you missed, they miss you too! The world wouldn’t be the same without you.”

“But I still won’t have you”. 

“Korra-I can’t, I just...”

“Can’t, or won’t?” Korra’s tone was final. 

“Korra, please.”

Korra turned her head back to the ceiling, eyes not nearly as bright as they once were. “I’m feeling ok today, Doc, thank you. I’d like to be left alone for right now though.”

Asami took a moment to look her over before standing silently and walking from the room. 

Her feet carried her absentmindedly to her office where she shut the door behind her, walked around to her desk, and crumpled into the chair. 

She couldn’t remember the last time she had cried this hard, it was so hard her throat was hurting from her choked screams. Why? Why  _ did _ it have to be like this? Why was she so fucking dumb that she had to push everyone away who ever cared for her? Why did Korra have to be her patient and why was everything a mess? Couldn’t she just have lived a generic life and come to work everyday and not get this close to her patients? 

Of course not, because that would have been too easy, and Asami Sato’s life had never been easy. Her mom, her dad, the company she never wanted a part of, the constant battle of people taking her seriously because of her age. Things had started to be good until the tanned, cancer ridden goddess waltzed through her doors and somehow made her feel more than she had in her whole life. 

She didn’t know how long she had been crying when Opal finally found her. 

“Asami?” Opal rushed to her. “Honey what happened?”

Asami looked up at her best friend and sobbed some more, eventually telling her through broken cries what had happened as Opal wiped her now very streaked makeup off her face. 

“Asami, baby, I love you,” Opal cooed, “but you’re a fucking idiot.”

“Excuse me?” Asami sniffled indignantly. 

Opal grabbed her face in her hands. “Korra has cancer, so what?! So did I and you don’t see me stopping my life. She is not your mom, Asami-“

“Opal, stop-“

“No you stop!” She cried. “You could walk out of this hospital and get hit and killed by a car today. You could drop dead right now from an aneurysm. So many things could happen that you would never know about but does that stop anybody from living? Fuck no! So why? Why the fuck are you denying yourself the possibility of happiness because of something that  _ might _ happen? Yea, Korra might die, but she also might  _ survive _ . The cancer might come back but she might survive that too. I’m tired of you making excuses of denying yourself what you want when there’s nothing certain in this life but death, so you might as well make everyday count. Cure her, kiss her, date her and fuck her senseless, Asami! You’ve wanted to for so long.”

“I’m scared,” Asami whispered, words spilling out easier than she had ever known they could. “I could so easily fall in love with her and I don’t know if I could recover from that loss.”

“Oh, Asami,” Opal wrapped her in a tight hug. “I’m scared too, I’m scared for you. I think the pain of regret for not trying would be harder than letting yourself love her for as long as you both might have. Would that be worth it? To give up a chance of a happy life for regret? You’ll never forgive yourself, and I think that’s what you’re most afraid of.”

It took her quite a while to think over all of what Opal just said. Fear is the best motivator in the world and she had always succumbed to it, had always given in and let herself be wrapped into a cocoon of solitude because it had been the easiest way to not feel fear again. But Opal’s words sent ripples through her head: regret. Instead of what if Korra died, maybe it could be what if Korra lived? What if she could wake up next to sleepy blue eyes and a crooked smile? What if they could both fight to give each other everything they wanted? Did she have a chance, a chance at living a life without fear of the wrong what if? 

Which was stronger, giving in and loving Korra only to watch her die, or watch from afar as Korra lived, getting to a point where she would be safe and then years were wasted. 

She had wasted enough years hiding. “You’re right,” Asami huffed and wiped her eyes. “Thank you, Opal. You always know how to knock sense into me.”

Opal smiled. “Come on, let's go get your girl.”

They got up and started to walk back to isolation. “I don’t think she’s going to be very happy to see me at the moment,” Asami grimaced, “she wasn’t exactly thrilled with me earlier.”

“Well I’ll be watching from the nurses station if her heart races when she sees you,” Opal nudged her and they laughed until the intercom blared. 

**_*CODE BLUE - ISO ROOM 2*_ **

“No!”

Asami had never run so fast in her life.  _ Korra.  _

They burst through the doors to see Zhu Li doing compressions, another nurse methodically squeezing the intubation bag. Asami rushed over and pushed Zhu Li away, climbing onto the bed and started her own compressions. 

“Zhu Li, call the ICU and tell them we’re coming up, everyone else let’s get moving!”

She was thankful she had a good team that listened to her orders in a beat. They brought up the rails and clicked off the stoppers, wheeling them quickly through the halls. This wasn’t protocol, but fuck protocol when she was trying to keep blood pumping through the heart she wanted to dote on. Opal screamed at people to move but Asami heard and saw nothing besides the compressing chest and cracking ribs of the girl she was about to give her own heart to for safe keeping. 

“Come on, Korra,” she grunted through pushes. “Damn it, stay with me, come on.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the immortal words of Britney Spears - oops, I did it again.
> 
> Code blue - when a patient is in cardiac arrest there is a "code team" that responds to begin resuscitative measures. 
> 
> One chapter left! I hope you all have enjoyed so far, I know I have :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always hate to end it, but here we are. I hope you all have enjoyed and thank you so much for reading!

Everything hurt. She had felt pain like this before but never so encompassing, radiating from her chest. And oh her chest, was it possible to be alive and feel this kind of pain? Her body felt dense, yet somehow she was floating. Her eyelids were like glue and it was so hard to breathe. Why was it so hard to breathe?

But then her lungs expanded without her beckoning them and she ripped her eyes open in panic. 

“Korra! Korra, please stay calm.”

_ Asami _ . That sweet voice could make her do anything and her heavy eyes found green, green that were lined with red and worry. 

“You’re on a ventilator, Korra,” Asami explained. “It’s helping you breathe because your lungs are very weak. I know it’s uncomfortable but just let your body relax.” She reached for the call button on the side of the bed and pushed it. “They are going to have to come in and assess you ok?”

Korra tried to nod but the pain was too much and she couldn’t move.

Asami seemed to understand because she smiled softly before trying something else. “Why don’t you try blinking once for yes and twice for no, how about that?”

Shutting her eyes was easy, her lids like resistance weights snapping back into place, but she did it. She blinked once, for Asami. 

“Good, are you in pain?”

One blink. 

“Do you want some medicine?”

Two blinks. 

“Korra...”

Two blinks. 

“Ok. Is it ok if I stay here while they check up on you?”

She hesitated, but gave one blink. Asami’s smile was worth it. 

An ICU doctor and a few nurses came in to assess her and took out her breathing tube, which had been a horrible feeling. They spoke to her but she wasn’t listening to much, all she heard was ‘cardiac arrest’ and ‘fluids,’ which meant absolutely nothing to her. Soon enough they were gone and it was just the two of them again. 

“Don’t try and talk, it will hurt,” Asami began. “Are you tired?”

One blink. 

“Get some rest, I’ll be here when you wake up, ok?”

Korra didn’t remember falling asleep after that but she felt a little better when she woke up later and Asami was still there, but she was asleep too. 

She took this moment of peace to just look at Asami. Her doctor usually had a regality about her, a commanding presence that she naturally assumed whilst walking around the hospital, but right now? No, she looked like the 26 year old she was, she looked young and tired. Korra had only ever seen her in that dress ( _ that dress _ ) and scrubs, but now she was wearing joggers and a baggy sweatshirt and she was fucking cute. 

Korra smiled at how nice it was that Asami was here, but then she remembered the last time they saw each other. She had felt like such shit a few minutes after Asami left and completely berated herself on how she had acted. The last thing she remembered was feeling her chest tighten, but she thought it was from the pain of yelling at Asami for something that wasn’t her fault. 

She was still tired, and Asami was sound asleep, so she took one last look before following her lead. 

When she woke up a second time, Asami was still there and typing on her laptop. 

“Hi,” she rasped when Asami hadn’t noticed her and those green eyes shot up.

“Hi,” Asami smiled, “don’t talk, ok? We can do the laptop, if your hands are ready?”

She had never put so much thought into moving her body but as heavy as she felt, her arms were just fine and she nodded.

Asami handed her the laptop and Korra typed quickly. 

_ ‘I’m sorry for yelling at you.’ _

Asami chuckled. “I accept your apology, Korra, and we’ll get to that but we should talk about what happened?

_ ‘I guess.’ _

“Essentially your body somehow went from completely fine to septic shock, resulting in cardiac arrest. Zhu Li just so happened to be walking into your room to check on you when you went v-fib. Her quick response was key in saving your life and we rushed you to the ICU where we had to shock your heart to get it back into proper rhythm, but with the heart and sepsis your body was crashing so we had to put you in an induced coma to try and regulate everything. You’ve had a blood transfusion from me to help fight the sepsis since your body recognizes my white blood cells. It’s been rough, but you’re awake.”

Korra stared at her as she took it all in and then typed. 

_ ‘How long was I in a coma?’ _

She curled into herself a bit. “Two weeks. It was for the best, even without your body shutting down you would have been in so much pain. Proper CPR is really brutal on the ribcage.”

_ ‘It still hurts really bad. Who do I have to thank for that?’ _

Asami paused. “Me.”

Korra gave her a lopsided grin.  _ ‘Always saving my life, aren’t you?’ _

Asami laughed but it also came out a sob and Korra was instantly worried. “I was so scared, Korra. Fuck I’ve never been so scared. You told me you wanted to give up and then that? You can’t do that to me, you promised you would fight.”

Korra went to type but Asami stopped her, tears flowing easily out of scared eyes. “Don’t you dare say sorry. For fucks sake, Korra, I’ve been going crazy this last week. I’ve never cared about someone the way I do about you and I’m so terrified. I can’t-I can’t live without you, do you understand that? Fuck the rules, fuck what people say, fuck cancer, I want you. Only you, Korra, and I’m so sorry I’ve pushed you away but I can’t anymore. I’m here, if you’ll still have me, but you need to promise me you won’t give up, I’m begging you.”

Korra stared at her with wide eyes before dropping her head to the bed and closing them slowly. She scrunched her eyes and replayed what Asami just said over and over again, trying to see if there was any catch, any way she misunderstood. 

_ ‘Say it again.’ _

“I want you,” Asami said with a watery laugh. “It took Opal yelling at me for being completely stupid to realize how much I want you. I want to give you everything, make you happy, do whatever I can to keep those beautiful eyes bright and a smile on your face. I’d rather live a scared life with you than a life of regret without you.”

Tears flowed hot and easy from Korra’s eyes as the words sunk in. After nearly a year of pain and suffering she saw a light at the end of the tunnel, and Asami was that light. Fuck this cancer but if getting the girl was the result, it might just have been worth it. 

“I promise,” she rasped again. “I’ll fight, I promise.”

And then Asami was full blown crying too, she burrowed her face into the sheets next to Korra’s leg and let the feelings from the last two weeks overwhelm her. All Korra wanted to do was wrap her up and hold her tight but she couldn’t move so she placed a gentle hand on the back of Asami’s head to soothe her. 

They stayed like that for a while and eventually Asami calmed down enough to turn her head and look up. Korra flashed her a smile and grabbed the laptop to type again. 

_ ‘If I had known that almost dying was the way to get you to give me a chance I would have done it sooner.’ _

Asami gave her an unimpressed look but Korra wore the cockiest grin that had both of them laughing, until Korra held her hand to her throat in pain. 

“Ok, just relax, let’s not do that again. And you’re not allowed to die on me, you promised.”

Korra nodded and scooted to one side of the bed, holding open her free arm that was unencumbered by tubes and wires, and patted the bed for Asami to come and join her. 

“I’m not sure that’s a great idea, Korra.”

But then Korra pouted and of course she gave it. She set the laptop down and looked at the door before slowly climbing into the bed. The angles were a little awkward and her stomach was in knots because they had never been this close but then Asami was cuddled into her side and planted a chaste but warm kiss on her cheek. 

Korra turned her head and tapped her lips for a real kiss and Asami shook her head. 

“Not a chance, Avatar. You have to get your immune system back before you get a kiss.”

Korra pouted and gave her pleading eyes but Asami just kissed her cheek again. “No. Get better, earn it.”

And then Asami was snuggling into the crook of her neck and she could feel her heartbeat quicken. As gentle, warm breaths puffed onto her neck Korra wondered immediately if she smelled bad. It’s not like she had been able to shower in two weeks so the sponge baths she must have gotten weren’t exactly her brand of body wash. Asami must have known what she was thinking because she snuggled deeper into their embrace and laughed softly. 

“You have thrown up on me multiple times, I think I can handle your ICU smell,” she blew a puff of hot air onto her neck and Korra got goosebumps. “If you’re worried though, you smell fine. Good, even.”

Korra hummed and let herself sink into this moment. Even with all the wires and an uncomfortable bed, Asami fit perfectly along her side and every place they were touching sizzled. The doctor was tall, taller than Korra by a few inches so she had to bend her knees but a soft hand curled over her shoulder and lips were ghosting the side of her neck and it was just too perfect, too comfortable. She closed her eyes and let the nearly overwhelming feeling of happiness lull her to sleep, feeling more content than she had felt in a long time. 

It was the best sleep she’s had in a year. 

//

The warmth leaving her side is what drew her out of that amazing sleep and she reached out for it with her hand. 

“Asami?” 

“Hey, sorry,” Asami whispered. “We got caught. Apparently it’s against the rules to share a bed with an ICU patient.”

Korra hummed and opened her eyes. They must have given her some pain medicine because she felt lighter than earlier. Or maybe it was just sleeping with Asami curled on her. “I don’t like rules.”

“Neither do I,” Asami said with a wicked smile, “but I do sort of have to keep up appearances here.”

“Are you going to be in trouble?” Korra asked with a little worry in her raspy voice. Her throat didn’t hurt as much and she was happy to be able to talk.

Asami searched her face for a moment before shaking her head. “No, I’m not in trouble. There’s actually something I kind of need to tell you.” She scooted her chair closer and rested her elbows on the side of the bed. “I’m kind of rich, like really rich. As in like I technically somehow own over half of this hospital so in reality unless I commit medical malpractice I don’t think I can get fired.”

Oh they definitely gave her drugs because  _ what? _ “Sorry, can you run that by me again?”

Asami scratched at her forehead awkwardly. “I’m Asami Sato, as in daughter of Hiroshi and Yasuko Sato, founders of Future Industries.” She puffed out her cheeks and let out a deep breath, smiling at the way Korra’s face dawned with realization. “When my dad died everything was left to me but he knew I didn’t want the company so through a bunch of legal jargon he put it in his will that I would get all of his shares of the company but CEO would be passed off to his assistant. I don’t really care to understand any of it, but Future Industries holds the majority of stakes in this hospital so in a roundabout way, I own it.”

“Wow,” Korra said in awe. She was no stranger to money, she had been paid more than she knew what to do with when she got signed to the Rebels, but this was a different kind of money. Deep pockets kind of stuff. “Wow.”

“And no one really knows either,” Asami continued. “The chair of this hospital, Varrick, he knows and he loves me. Opal and Zhu Li do too because Varrick and Zhu Li...well that’s another story for a different day. Tenzin of course knows but that’s about it. Sato is a relatively common last name so I float under the radar.”

Korra nodded dumbly, “that’s why I never connected it.”

“Does this...” Asami fidgeted nervously, “does this change anything...about us?”

_ Us _ . Korra about melted, but the concern on Asami’s face snapped her out of it. 

“What? No!” Her throat screamed at the exertion and she calmed down before continuing. “No, Asami, that doesn’t matter to me. I have plenty of my own money so I’m not trying to be a gold digger and if you didn’t notice, I fell for you long before I knew any of this.”

Asami smiled wide and looked dreamy, “good.”

//

“Looking a little slow there, Avatar!”

Korra slowed her jog and stopped in front of the steps that Asami and Naga were perched on. “I was going easy on you,” she panted, bending over to catch her breath. 

“What do you think, Naga?” Asami asked the dog sweetly, “do you think Korra let us win, hmm?”

Naga barked loudly and lolled out her tongue. 

Korra scoffed. “Traitor.”

“Come on, champ,” Asami said with a laugh. “Lets go make some lunch.”

Their jogs had become a somewhat constant routine over the last few weeks. It had been a little over four months since Korra’s stay in the ICU, and things had really looked up in those months. The bone marrow transplant really started to kick in and her white blood cells decided to finally start working properly. Besides the low dose chemo of round three that was used to keep the leukemia at bay, Korra had started to feel a little more like herself. 

She had started off by working out gently, just to build some of the muscle mass back that she had lost over her treatment. Nothing near her old routine, but she was working her way back to more than an emaciated body. She had a long way to go, but Korra smiled in the mirror more now when she could see the lines of definition returning. 

Asami had been there every step of the way, too. Being incredibly rich had its perks, of course, and Asami’s house boasted a wonderful personal gym that had Korra drooling.  _ It’s much safer this way, gyms are full of germs, _ Asami had stated plainly when she invited Korra over the first time. They trained together when Asami didn’t have work, which albeit wasn’t very often, but they made it work and somehow after about two weeks Korra got a key to the house.  _ Naga likes the yard and you need a safe place to work out, _ Asami had offered with an easy air but Korra could see her blush. 

When they started jogging together a few weeks ago it simply turned into an easy system of running with Naga and then coming back and making food. While Asami used to live at the hospital because it was all she had, she slowly had started staying home when she wasn’t needed. She had a pager if there was an emergency, but she had better things to do now, which of course was Korra. 

Not that they  _ do _ anything, they haven’t even kissed yet, but they’re working on it. They’ve come close a few times but it’s always been interrupted by a phone call or Opal being an ass, but there’s really no rush. They honestly have just been enjoying the time to actually get to know one another outside the hospital and outside of the sterile weirdness of those white walls. They go on little dates and talk endlessly, usually winding up in a park somewhere to enjoy the outdoors and fresh air. Asami always watched in adoration as Korra would tilt her head back and close her eyes, breathing in the open air and felt the elements around her. 

It was beautiful. Korra was beautiful. She was positively divine and Asami was in constant awe. 

Asami started to cook their food while Korra went to the bathroom to wash her face off from the run. 

“Asami, look!” Korra said happily as she came out of the bathroom. She walked towards Asami and lifted up her shirt. “My abs are back!”

Asami looked and then looked again and wow. They sure were back. They probably weren’t as defined as before Korra started treatment, but  _ damn _ . She was staring. 

“Asami? Are you alright?”

“I’m gay.”

They both paused before breaking into laughter. Korra was holding her stomach she was laughing so hard and Asami had to walk away from the stove. 

“Wow,” Korra said as she wiped away a tear. “Good to know I’m not the only one.”

Asami turned back to the food and shook her head. What a dork. “I’ll have you know that after your first appointment with me I ran to the cafeteria and had a gay panic about your abs to Opal.”

“So you like them?” Korra asked with a grin and patted her stomach. 

Asami rolled her eyes and turned off the burner. “I like them  _ and _ you. Now can you grab me the salt? This is almost ready.”

Korra winked and did as she was asked. “Asami, why the hell do you keep the salt up so high,” she huffed as she reached on her tippy toes for the salt on the top shelf of the cabinet. 

“Because you over salt everything so I have to keep it away from you.” She walked over and reached up over the shorter woman to grab the salt and Korra turned around to pout. 

“But salt makes everything taste better.”

Her retort was blocked by Naga coming up behind her and pushing Asami into Korra. She braced her hands on the counter as Korra grabbed her stomach for stability and their eyes locked as they were barely a breath apart. 

Apparently Naga knew they needed a literal push to get their shit together. Neither of them knew who moved first but their lips were soft on each other and nothing else mattered in that moment. Asami tilted her head to deepen the kiss as her arms wrapped around that tan neck and Korra’s arms tightened around her waist. 

“Is this ok?” Asami asked breathlessly when she pulled away after a minute. 

Korra tugged her back. “Just shut up and kiss me already.”

And oh did she. Asami broke off to lift Korra up onto the counter, earning a gasp and tight hands in her hair as their lips crashed back together. She snaked her hands under Korra’s sweaty tank top to run her fingers over those abs and she could feel the frantic sigh on her lips. She moved her hands around and up Korra’s taut back, raking her nails down the lines of her spine and then pulling them flush together. 

“I don’t want lunch anymore,” Korra panted when they parted for air. Her chest was heaving and those blue eyes were blown. Asami almost considered declining but Opal’s words crawled into her head.  _ ‘The only thing certain in life is death, so make every day count. Cure her, kiss her, date her and fuck her senseless.’ _ Well she hadn’t gotten to the curing part, but she could take care of the rest. 

She took one last look into those blown blue eyes before dragging Korra off the counter and carrying her to her room.  _ Make every day count. _

As they lie together sweaty and naked later, Asami running soft fingers over Korra’s back, she closed her eyes and let the feeling of unadulterated joy wash over her. It had been so good. So, so good. 

Korra had been a little embarrassed at first, stating that it had been a while and that she was self conscious about her body, but then Asami had smiled reassuringly from between her legs and made Korra forget her own name. Minutes had turned into hours of touching, exploring, worshipping one another. Even though Korra wasn’t even at the top of her game in terms of strength and stamina, her willingness to learn and adapt had Asami shaking and crying out her name more than she knew she could. 

Soft kisses into her collarbone brought her out of her thoughts and she giggled. “You want more?”

Korra kissed the spot again and sank further into their embrace. “No, too tired. I just like your skin, it’s so soft.”

Asami hummed and held Korra closer. Somewhere in the middle of a wicked tongue and fingers curling inside of her, Asami had finally dropped every last vestige of fear of what  _ could _ be. Korra was here, she was alive against so many odds and fuck if she was going to waste any time worrying about what could be when she could be spending it like that. She had been stupid, but she wouldn’t change anything. Things were perfect, Korra was perfect. For the first time in a long, long time, Asami was happy. With hot, sweaty, dark skin against her own and light puffs of breath against her neck, Asami wondered if the delicious ache she felt from the joy in this moment would ever go away. She had plenty of time to find out. 

//

It took six years. Six years and one relapse that nearly shattered her heart into a billion irreparable pieces, but Asami did it. A week before their third wedding anniversary, Asami finally did it. 

She sat back in her chair and read over the reports again and again, stopping a few times to look into the microscope and see if it was real. As it sunk in her chest was screaming between tightening from excitement and bursting with joy. They say life flashes before your eyes before you die, but she wasn’t dying and now she held in her hand the key to keeping her wife alive and away from cancer's deathly claws. No, a life was flashing before her eyes now because there wasn’t a fear of death anymore. 

_ Korra. _

The first time they met, her bad days in isolation, weeks in the ICU; Korra slowly moving into Asami’s house without either of them realizing it; Asami seeing one of Korra’s games in person and getting to kiss her stupid on the field. So many memories flew through her head and they all swirled around those damn blue eyes and a cocky grin. Though their engagement and wedding had been lovely and symbolic, their true treasure was just getting to live a life together, a happy life. A life she couldn’t wait to continue for as long as the fates would allow.

She rushed home, to their home, where Korra was giving Naga a long needed bath since they had both been rather busy lately. Asami with her research and Korra being back on season, Naga had taken her freedom to dig in the backyard and get all muddy. 

“Korra?” She called as she walked through the foyer in search of her wife. 

“In here!” Korra called from Naga’s bathroom and yes, Naga had her own bedroom and bathroom. She was their princess. 

Asami found her shirtless, elbows deep in dirty suds with an incredibly dirty and happy dog. “I did it, Korra.”

Korra grunted and scrubbed a patch of fur. “What did you do?”

“I isolated the proteins in the stem cells from the blood,” Asami choked. “They-they can be given to anyone now, no match needed...I-I did it.”

Korra dropped the scrubber and turned to her wife with wide eyes and suddy arms. “You did it.”

“I did it.” She covered her mouth with her hand and let out a sob. She did it. She didn’t have to worry anymore. 

“You did it!” Korra took the two steps needed to reach her and swept Asami up into the air, bringing her back down into a tight embrace. “You did it. Fuck, I love you so much, Asami.” She kissed her cheek and held her close, neither of them caring about the suds. “You did it.”

Naga jumped out of the tub and toppled them both over, licking their faces and drenching them in dirty water but they both broke out in laughing sobs. This was their life, and they were going to be ok. They had each other, and Naga, and that’s all they ever needed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all again for making it this far with me and I truly hope you enjoyed this story!
> 
> I feel like I'm forgetting to write something here and I'll probably come back to edit this note but oh well. In the meantime, I'm really itching to write more stories but I've kind of hit a wall for ideas so if any of you have any I would love to hear them, or if you know a place where I can get some sort of prompt I would love you forever (I already do, but whatever). 
> 
> Thank you and I love you all! Stay safe and most importantly, listen to your body when something doesn't seem right!
> 
> Edit: 07/28/2020 - I remember what I wanted to write...go ahead and take a listen to "Cancer" by My Chemical Romance, if you've never heard it before. My 10th grade biology teacher had us listen to it and even now, well over 10 years later, I still get choked up listening to it. Sorry if it hurts, but it hurts oh so good!
> 
> Another edit to add this amazing fanart!!! - https://jellolegos.tumblr.com/post/640420922206158848/sketching-based-on-would-you-risk-it-all-by
> 
> Thank you so much, Jellolegos, I fucking love it!!


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